Living Not Meant To Be

Nobody seems to hear me, nobody seems to care
That my life has now become too much for me to bear
and every time I hurt myself and every time I’m scared
Its not just my skin but its my soul that’s being teared

And the dreams where I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
Because they give me hope that one day I’ll stop feeling sad
I close my eyes and cry, looking for some lost hope
But when I’m all alone how am I to cope?

If only there was some one in which I could confide
My body could stop being scratched at from way down deep inside
My heart’s become a burden, it can’t survive the pain
And when it finally stops beating it will never be whole again

My life’s been taken over by shadows that lie within
As though there now lives inside me, the seven deadly sins
I can’t survive this nightmare, I don’t want to go it alone
But there is no one who loves me and I know I have no home

My body has been scarred from inside as well as out
So I reach out for a knife and without a trace of doubt
Pierce it with determination through my shattered heart
And now I finally realize my life has been torn apart

My death serves as a reminder to all those that caused me heartache
And their guilt lives on forever as I’m buried by the lake
My father’s dressed in black as he wipes away fake tears
No one ever knew how he abused me for all those years

My school is a haunting memory of the bullying I endured
And still I come to wonder why no one wanted me cured
Now I am in heaven, I live in peace and harmony
For close by are my guardian angels who came and rescued me

I am happier than I’ve ever been now I know that I am safe
And the key to that happiness was just a little faith
No one can ever hurt me because finally I am free
Dying is easy, living just wasn‘t meant to be.