The Singing Santa - Part 2 - A Craven Danger Mystery
“Mr. Danger!” said Betty. “I got ya a job! And ya don’t gotta solve a thing. All ya gotta do is sing, just like ya do in the office when ya think no one’s listening.”
When Betty barged into Craven Danger’s office, Craven was tuning his ukulele.
“Oh, ya found it, huh?” said Betty.
“Yeah,” said Craven. “And I didn’t even know it was lost until I poked my head out the window. And just what the heck was my ukulele doin’ on the other side of the window?”
“I was swattin’ pigeons,” said Betty. “They were makin’ a mess all over the flag pole again. I heard ’em all the way from my desk. You weren’t here, so I ran in and grabbed the first thing handy.”
“My ukulele?" said Craven. “Now it’s got beak marks all over it.”
“Well,” said Betty, “they was swattin’ back. It was either them or me.”
“Now it don’t sound right when I play it,” said Craven.
“I gotta tell ya, Mr. Danger,” said Betty. “I don’t think it’s the ukulele’s fault.”
“No?” said Craven.
“No,” said Betty. “The fault, dear Mr. Danger, ain’t in our ukulele’s, But in ourselves."
“How many times I gotta tell ya to stop quotin’ that brother-in-law a yours?” said Craven. “And what the heck ya doin’ with that Santa suit?”
“Oh,” said Betty. “That‘s why I come in here to begin with. Since we ain’t got ourselves a case, and your so darned bored, I thought ya might wanna go sing for ya supper. Mr. Fritter, from across the hall, needs a singin’ Santa to work a posh party at the Empire State Building.”
“A singin’ Santa?” said Craven. “As if singin’ in public ain’t humiliatin’ enough, you want me ta do it in a Santa suit? And in front of people?”
“Well I’m guessin’ it ain’t a pussy cat party,” said Betty. “I’m supposin’ they’ll be people there. What are ya so scared of?”
“People,” said Craven. “People starin’. It gives me the hives.”
“You’ll be in a Santa suit,” said Betty. “Ya can pretend your Sinatra or somebody. They won’t know Craven Danger’s behind that suit. Heck, they won’t know Craven Danger period.”
“Well, that’s a swell thought,” said Craven. “I’ll be unanimous.”
“Anonymous,” said Betty.
“Whatever,” said Craven.
“I guarantee,” said Betty. “Once ya put that beard on, you’ll feel like a completely different person.”
“Oh, I’ll feel different, all right,” said Craven. “Do I gotta wear the hat?”
“Of course,” said Betty. “It ain’t Santa without the hat. Trust me. Now I gotta go make some iced tea and go on a picnic with Sidney. So remember. Seven PM sharp. Empire State building. Twenty seventh floor.”
“How do I let ya talk me into these things?” said Craven. ”If ya wasn’t so deplorable I’d put my foot down.”
“Ya mean adorable,” said Betty.
“Whatever,” said Craven.