A Beautiful Game

The Beautiful Game
By
Ian Rome

It sits high on the tee, mocking, challenging; the fairway, wide and
inviting. The red flag flutters in the breeze, two hundred yards away.
An easy shot. The club swings back and up, comes down in a perfect arc.
The ball slices right. Oh hell! Into the trees again!

This is typical of hundreds-possibly thousands of amateur golfers
across the country. So why do they keep going back? This is a question
many golf-widows ask their friends over coffee. "Twice a week he goes
and as far as I can tell, he is useless!"
The first important point is on the golf course no-body gives a stuff
how good or bad you are. It is probably the only game that is purely
down to individual effort. Under normal circumstances the only score
you want to beat is your own from previous rounds-but it goes far
deeper than that.

Take your average golf course: an oasis of lush, green grass, a whole
world away from the daily grind, smoke, cars and crowds. To get that
tiny ball around eighteen holes without falling foul of the long grass,
dense woodland and deep sandy bunkers is a monumental challenge and-for
your average golf player-to get it around in less than one hundred
shots is a major achievement.
Every player of mediocre standard knows with certainty at least one
hole will be a major catastrophe, a par 4 that is completed in double
figures, but hey, who cares - For there is one sound that makes it all
worth while-the sound of the perfect strike.

We have all heard it, that beautiful clear, "PING," as metal hits ball
square on, the ball making a perfect flight, right down the centre of
the fairway. It may only happen once in eighteen holes, but by God, it
is worth the wait. It is this one shot that impels you to return for
more punishment. It is even better when, because of this shot, you get
the ball into the hole in the regulation number of shots.

Finally, there's the total peace and quiet of the golf course, just the
elements, the trusty bag of clubs and the golfer. What more could a man
ask for on his days off - Pure paradise.

If this hasn't convinced anybody to live and let live when it comes to
golf, look at it like this. Depending upon where one lives, it costs up
to ?200 to travel to watch ones favourite soccer team play on a
Saturday-ninety minutes of sometimes dubious entertainment. But a
golfer can pay as little as ?15 for a round of eighteen holes and four
hours of total bliss after which he arrives home safe and ready for the
next golfing challenge!

END