Roam'in The International Gnome

Concreted, firmly on the patio

He sits in mute reflection to the last

A faded hue and subtle chips

The only measure to his past

Between the Buddleia and goldfish pond

He drapes his tiny fishing shaft

His furtive expeditions

Catalogued, captured

And sent in copious photograph

The truth behind his worldwide status

Every inch of global turf, he's trod

Lies, mid this innocent garden gnome

And his ornamental God

Angled along side Pizza

To accentuate its lean

A medallion and a hairpiece

Snapped in New York's

Effervescent beam

Chaps were formed in Mexico

And a chilly, dangled from his pole

A passport aquired from Ireland

In Wales he claimed the dole

He, has a bank account in Monaco

A water fairy in every dock

Some insane garden thief's afoot!

Work'in Roam'in round the clock

A wily criminality, a gang

Of wicked brigands, having fun

Have stolen his patio-locale

And enforced a flush, of far-flung sun

Shot from beneath a gushing waterfall

Complete with Barbie water-wings

No length these crooked gnome nappers

Will resort too

Constructing gnome size, accessories and things

A tiny kilt in Scotland

A lace negligee in France

He's been tutored in rodeo

And extreme hovering

He can, ski, and surf, and dance

He's strode through hallowed hallways

Seen every wonder of the world

And yet, sits firmly on his captive patio

Oblivious and silent

To the evidence inferred

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