That Mug

That Mug

I used to look fondly at that mug you bought me; you know, the one that
read 'You Can't Scare Me, I've Got Kids.'
I try to use it as little as possible now. In fact, I only ever use it
if all the other cups and glasses are filled with mould or ash and I
can't be bothered to wash up.
But that cup scares me now. The person who thought up the catchy little
slogan simply could not have had kids. Must have been some single guy
who thought he knew how it felt to have kids. Thought, but never really
knew.
Because if he had had kids he would have known, irrefutably, that he'd
got his mug wrong.
It's because I do have kids that you DO scare me.

I was the mug.