STONES.

I was given vouchers for hitting a huge milestone at work, the money reflected the many years, that I have worked there. Their lists of vouchers, does not go up to the number of years that I have worked for the Company. My manager had informed me, after I had received the vouchers, “I had asked the Company finance department, if they could give you the money and they had informed me, ‘No,’ they must have talked about it, and realized, that not many in the whole of the UK has worked that long for them, that they thought, why not.” He went on, “I am pleased for you Maxine.” I was chuffed to bits, as were the people I told.

My plan was not to waste the vouchers, which consist of, me choosing in 10’s what I wanted to spend, then my manager would send me the barcode for that store. The first shop I chose was Marks and Spencer’s. It was because of these two bras and the fact that I had to buy the next size up, it was there and then in the changing room, that I decided to go on a diet!!!! I was shocked with myself, how the weight had crept up. I decided there and then, to take-action!

Like many, I had tried to go on diets before and like many have failed miserably. Over the years when I have worked with many smokers, they have said, “I am giving up smoking, and have thrown away the cigarettes that I have left.” I decided not to do that, all the fatty things that I have, I had no intention of throwing them away. I would use them until they were gone, and then I would not buy them again.

The first thing I did was weigh myself then I wrote on my trusted calendar on the wall of the Lounge, that only I use. That calendar is the is the be all and end all, if it is not on there, it does not exist. The two works sites that I work at is on there, and other events and when it is my long weekend with Mum, it is all on there. I wrote the date of the start of my diet.

Paul does all the cooking for us, each of his meals is made with love, and all meals are the size enough for two people, on each plate. He does the Best homemade chips ever! We have his chips once a week, either with, homemade huge burgers, packed full with onions and garlic, his gravy is to die for!!! I love gravy. At other times he batters fish, and we have that with his chips or on another week we have sausage eggs and chips! All yum. I said to Paul, “Please don’t cook for me, this includes the days that you cook chips.” He said, “OK.” He is a good egg.

Next what I did was, buy various things around every two or three days. I started off by buying cooked mackerel, as this I had eaten in the recent past. With that I would cook a baked potato or two, in the microwave. We always have lots of potatoes in the kitchen ready for Pauls chips. While the microwave is on, I peel either half an onion or a whole onion and fry that in butter, if I have mushrooms, that too is added with the onions. If I have enough cherry tomatoes, the £2 pack type, three of those are added too. Then I add a small portion of the cooked fish, to warm it through. The process of buying and then cooking it and then sitting down and enjoying it, is fabulous. I also buy different types of mixed salad, already washed, sometimes I buy one avocado, I then pour the cooked fried onions over the jacket potato that I have cut open, nothing else is added to the potato, as the butter has already been added to the onions.

I enjoy the meal slowly, and savour the time that I am eating.

Soon I lost half a stone! I was chuffed to bits! I could not see where it had gone from. I took a picture of me on the scales.

Slowly I started to tell people on a need-to-know basis, as it was not like me to refuse anything! Someone had left at work a pack of Jaffa cakes in the kitchen, I didn’t know who had left it there, but the Maxine of old would have had one, two or three from the pack. Some co-workers do leave biscuits for the rest of us to help ourselves, but the new me, I had to try and resist. I did resist, but the next day, it was still there, I said to manager, “It is still there,” He said, “You have my permission to eat them.” The Maxine of old would have eaten them the day before! I said, to him, “Thank you but I will leave them.”

I decided, in my mind, for it was a diet of the MIND, that whatever went in my mouth, made the scales go up and if it didn’t go in my mouth, the scales would go down. There was no room for cheating, for who would I be cheating but myself.

I soon found-out that my weakest vulnerable time was after my evening meal, when I had many hours to go before bed at around 2am. Then I would watch telly, have lots of 40 winks and had the munchies!!! The munchies consisted of, Cart Dor ice-cream, with red sweet ice-cream sauce over it squeezed generously over it, with more added. Then I would have BBQ Hula Hoops, two bags, Foamies at other times, the whole bag, whatever cake was reduced I would have a slice with custard, I love custard as much as I love gravy. Cheesecake also with custard or cream or both! I had no limits, until Bra-Gate!!!!

To combat the munchies, I decided to buy large bananas, and when the cravings started in the early evenings I would do one of two things, I would speak to myself, inside my head and say “No,” Any cravings is strong, be it drugs, alcohol, smoking, gambling, or food! I had to keep on saying, “No,” until either it went, and if it went, then the next day, I would see that at a Win. A win meant the scales would be lighter. If I had to have something, then I would go to the kitchen and have a banana, I would eat it slowly, and it would always do the trick. It was enough, for at first it was the horrible feeling of hunger that would consume me. Nothing would satisfy me, but my usual huge calorie fix. When I had the banana in the evening, I would at first have it between two slices of bread. A co-worker said, “That is carb with carb,” I said, “What is a carb?” She said, “It is not good to have both or either at night.” I said, to her, that is why I have decided to called this, “My Diet, My Way.” Because I make my own rules. My diet, my way seemed to work, for the following month I had lost one whole stone!! That was the first time in my 60’s that I had lost any weight, on purpose.

My diet, my way, when I settled down, consisted of mainly two meals a day, with a meal around 11am and the second around 6pm then a banana. But once I had slightly buttered toast instead, as that was what I fancied. There was no guilt with that, as with my diet, my way, if I were to go out for a meal that would be ok, that would be seen as a ‘treat.’ Years ago, when I tried to diet, I decided to have One treat a day, but it didn’t work, for the whole day I would be thinking of the flaming treat!

So, treats were generally out! But soon after I had started this diet, I know the ice-cream was in the freezer, and wanted some, that was ok, for instead of having a large portion I had a small one, with no red sweet sauce. No guilt was attached with it.

When my malt extract that I had now and again was finished, I didn’t buy anymore. Each morning, I used to have hot chocolate mixed with lovely sweet creamy evaporated milk, when the hot chocolate, finished, I didn’t buy anymore, nor the sweet tinned milk, that I have enjoyed for years.

I went to work at the smaller site, they didn’t know I was on a diet, and one of the two co-workers that I was working with that day, she had brought in a pack of the nicest mixed packs of biscuits that I had seen in a long time, she said, “This is for us three, enjoy.” I said, to her, “I’m on a diet, so I won’t be having any, but thank you.” And when they both went out, I was there all alone with those delicious looking biscuits on the desk, I did not yield. I didn’t have one. I was also there the next day, and a pack of Starburst were bought for us three to share. My response was the same. I did not have one, even when I was alone for hours.

When we are alone, that is when we show our true selves. What is the point of cheating? Who am I cheating? Myself. There is a brand of duck spring rolls that I absolutely love the same brand do samosas too, when they are reduced in my local supermarket, I always buy them, they are like my meal out treat, I have them on their own or with sweet cherry tomatoes. They make a filling and satisfying meal. I always look first at the reduced section of the fridge section of the store, for that determines what my meal will be that evening or for the following day. So, if sliced cooked beef is there, I will buy that, and have it with my jacket potato, fried onions cooked in butter, mushrooms if I have it and small tomatoes, some salad from the mixed bag that is already washed. If plain chicken cooked breast is reduced, then I will buy that, that would make two meals, if any is left, then it is for the cats. My manager once gave me three packs of pate, that he got reduced, I had one whole pack on two slices of toast and gave the other two to the cats and dogs, so that was a win, win. That evening nothing else was eaten that night, to balance it out, until the next day around 11am.

I suppose I would see this diet as an adventure. A co-worker said to me, this week, “How much do you want to lose?” I said, “If I can lose another stone, that would be fantastic, but when I got there, if a lost three stones that would be fantastic but four stones would be my maximum, for after that, I would have to retrain my brain to eat more treats.

At the very start of the diet, I found an unopened box of Raffaello, it was bought by my best friend. At first when I found it, I put it in the bin, there was nothing else in the bin, then I thought about Paul, so I took it out and put it on Paul’s sofa. When Paul saw it, I said to him, “This was a gift to me, you can have it, but do not let me see it, if I see it, I Will throw it away, you must hide it from me.” Paul replied, “OK.”

I make a small flask at work, and used to add a tiny bit of sugar to it, that stopped, and now I just have a slice of fresh ginger in along with the tea bag and milk.  

I googled which would be best to have with my meals, paprika or cayenne pepper, as no salt would ever be added. I haven’t added salt for years, but only with chips outside the home. I bought both, but cayenne pepper was the better of the two. Cayenne pepper, can help to reduce appetite suppression for weight control, it is good for your heart, and can lower blood pressure, it can boost immunity, it is a good source of vitamin C. Cayenne pepper also contains antioxidants, it is good for pain relief, reduces inflammation and it even supports digestion and more! Oh, and one more thing on cayenne pepper, it is good for arthritis and muscle injuries.

At the start of my diet, I was still having salad cream, but a co-worker said, “It is not good,” What I decided to do, was if I had no butter at work, I would then add salad cream instead, so that I would still have something nice on my plate.

I don’t know how far my adventure will take me, but for this season of my life, I will enjoy buying the food, cooking the food, eating the food and knowing that all the no's in my mind diet, will be a time of learning more about my body, I don’t want to be too thin, but I want to be able be in control, so that I can say yea or nay, so that instead of food controlling me, that I can show myself and others, that it can be done, for if I can do it, so can they.

I am also sure, now that I am not eating between meals, that my cholesterol will also go down.

I have bought a lovely thank you card for my manager, for asking the finance section for me, I have included £10 in it, for he too is on a diet, that money is instead of the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups that he loves SO much, I will give it to him on Monday. x