L/ Demotion

"So Mr Fraser?" The bald man put on his glasses and then picked up
the sheet of paper from his desk. He seemed to have a permanent frown
on his face and when he attempted a smile, it looked more like a
grimace. "In your previous job, you were?"


"A police officer." Peter interrupted nervously. "I remained
in the post for six years."


"Right." The interviewer looked back at him. Peter already
felt that there was little point in continuing. It seemed that this man
had already made the decision that he was not right for the job. "Can I
ask why you decided to resign? It seems to me as if you were fairly
settled where you were."


Peter looked down for a moment taking a deep breath. Feeling
strangled, he loosened the neck of his shirt with two fingers. He
didn't do interviews. He remembered back to his first one in his late
teens. In fact he had never got there as he had thrown up beforehand
and convinced his mother that he was too ill to attend. It wasn't just
the questions he couldn't handle; it was the way that he felt so
powerless. He hated the fact that the man opposite was judging him.
With every word that Peter muttered, he was assessing if he could cut
it in the work place; if he could show his initiative and excel his
abilities. In effect he was looking to see if this stranger before him
was a successful human being or just another Mr average. What gave him
the right to make such a decision?


"Mr Fraser?" The interviewer repeated; his tone agitated.



"Yes sorry." Peter cleared his throat and looked up, bright
eyed. What the heck! There was no way he was going to get the job now
so why make the effort? "I guess I didn't enjoy it really." He said at
last leaning forwards to take the man on. "All those clean shirted
chiefs thinking they were better than everyone else. They had their
eyes permanently fixed upwards they did? grabbing for the next
opportunity to climb higher up that ladder before I could get a hold."
He laughed bitterly. "You know what? I didn't get one promotion in the
six years I slogged it out in the force. Always a bloody PC I was?
roaming the streets chasing after little brats who couldn't be arsed to
go to school."


"Thank you." The man said firmly rising to his feet. "I think
I've heard enough. I can tell you now that we will not be offering you
a place here." Looking flustered, he opened his office door indicating
for Peter to leave.


"Of course you won't!" Peter stood tall, finally enjoying the
interview. Who needed to work hard to gain a position of power? He had
achieved one instantly. "To tell you the truth, I wouldn't have
accepted anyway if it would mean rubbing shoulder's with the likes of
you. You think you're the next big thing don't you?" Peter snarled as
he grabbed his application form from the man's hand. "Well I can tell
you now that you're just under an illusion. Without your precious job,
you're nobody! At least I don't need to hide under a security blanket
to survive."


"Thank you Mr. Fraser!" The man's voice rose angrily. "And
goodbye."


*


Peter pushed open the front door and entered his house
tentatively. He wasn't in the mood to face his wife's judgement. As he
expected, she had been sitting in the lounge waiting and rushed over as
soon as she saw him.


"How did it go love?" She asked anxiously wrapping her arms
around his neck. "I'm so proud of you whether you get the job or not. I
just like you to make an effort that's all? instead of sitting around
the house sulking." She looked into his eyes and then kissed him
softly. "Just look at you all handsome in your suit. I bet you made a
real impression dressed like that." Peter felt her lips caressing his
sweaty neck. He swallowed hard and edged away.


"Please love? not now ok?"


"What's wrong?" She purred pressing her body against his and
stroking the side of his face with her hand. "I'm just complementing
you on how nice you look."


Peter gritted his teeth. He needed space to think things
though without being suffocated by Tina every second. She was too
demanding. He hadn't been ready to go to any of the job interviews but
she had persuaded him, saying that he had been without a job for long
enough.


"I won't be getting the bloody job!" He exploded suddenly,
pushing her away. "In fact I won't be going for another interview again
so you can stop going on at me."


Startled, Tina said nothing. She backed away, glaring at him.
He remarked how she had changed so rapidly from the woman a few moments
earlier. Now she looked like a wild animal ready to pounce. He even
felt his hair stand on end in trepidation as he awaited her
reaction.


"You're a poor excuse for a man." She said finally. Here we
go; Peter thought to himself, she was just getting going. He knew that
she had spent the last few minutes dredging up all the negative things
she could possibly think of. Now she had the ammunition and was ready
to fire. "I bet you never even went to that interview did you? Just
like all those other times."


"I did actually." His voice was now calm. He strolled into
the kitchen and began to scurry around for food. "If you must know, I
had no intention of getting that job. I'm going to start my own
business." He began buttering a slice of bread.


"Don't be ridiculous!" Tina had followed him into the room.
"You've tried that before and it was a complete failure. You need to
get a proper job? we're really struggling for money."


Peter bit into his bread. He had the feeling that he had
entered the eye of a storm and the worse part was yet to come. He
chewed slowly, watching her from a distance. She collapsed onto a
stool, head in hands. For a while she remained like that in the
silence. Then suddenly she clenched her fist and sent a mug hurtling
across the room. "Stop eating!" She screamed. Peter stopped and looked
down at the shards of pottery scattered by his feet. That used to be
his favourite cup, he thought with detachment.


"You know what? I've had enough this time!" She began again.
"I don't know why you ever quit the police in the first place. At least
you were beginning to make something of yourself there. Sometimes I
think you're just plain lazy? or perhaps you can't handle the
commitment of real work." Peter had to stop himself from laughing. She
had absolutely no idea what he had been going through! She was just the
same as them, looking down on him and underestimating his ability. No
one could see his true potential. That was the reason why he hadn't
kept working, not because of any of the rubbish she was talking about.
His father had been the same, always casting Peter off as the failure
in the family. Perhaps he had never achieved the best grades but at
least his standards were high. He wouldn't settle for the label his
father had given him. He would prove him wrong and show everyone the
success he really was.


"Why do you think that you're so much better than everyone
else?" Tina continued. "You've been like this ever since we got
married! Always taking the attitude that you're somehow superior to the
rest of the world." She was looking at him now, a pained expression on
her face. "Maybe I could have coped with some of it?" She sighed. "And
I did? but what I can't stand if the way you block yourself off from me
as if it's all my fault and I'm somehow responsible!" She wiped a tear
from her eye. "And I'm not. You've done this to yourself Peter. You've
turned your back everyone?" She paused, taking a deep breath. "And now
you've turned your back on me too." Tina pushed herself up slowly. She
glanced at his face one more time before walking from the kitchen.
Peter remained still until he heard the front door slam
shut.


*


"She's left me!" Peter slurred through his tears. "Nine years
s'of marriage an she's gone an left me." He took a swig from the bottle
of vodka in his hand.


"That's women for you." The old man growled from besides him.
He didn't seem happy that Peter had joined him on the park bench and
was now engaging him in a conversation. Peter looked up at the clear
night sky which seemed to be spinning above him. All those ambitions
and this was where he had ended up!


"I always thought I would make it big?" He confided. "When I
was young I wanted to be a great star." He began to laugh
uncontrollably pointing a hand into the air. "Just like those little,
little stars up there but the brightest of them all!" He squeaked
waving his arm around.


"Don't we all mate." The old man agreed rising to his feet.
"And that's exactly what holds us down."


Peter sighed and flopped onto the bench as he watched the man
walk away into the distance. He felt an uncontrollable urge to sleep or
to urinate. Everything began to spin around again and he closed his
eyes, feeling as if the world was swallowing him up. Then he reopened
them and stared out into the darkness. He began to hum softly and
gradually the noise grew louder, deafening him.


"Shut up!" He said at once. The words echoed out into the
darkness, reverberating around the empty park.


Suddenly, in the distance he noticed someone coming towards
him. For a while he lay still, his head against the splintered wood.
Then he pulled himself up from the bench and dragged his feet forwards,
the vodka bottle dripping from his fingers.


"Hello?" Peter groaned. He would show this person that he
ruled the park. He was the one in control around here. No one would
look down on him thinking that they were superior! How wrong they had
all been to suppose that? How misled to think that they could take a
position of authority over Peter Fraser? Soon they would all see who
really had the upper hand. They would realise how they had been so
grossly mistaken.


Peter neared the dark figure and raised the bottle into the
air. The smash resounded into the night sky.


*


Peter awoke with a throbbing headache. He groaned turning on
his side and feeling the pain shoot through his body. He swallowed
heavily fighting the urge to vomit. Suddenly he heard a door creak open
and footsteps coming towards him. He rubbed his eyes and then plied
them open.


"You never had a great aim did you Fraser?"


He felt his heart dribble down into his stomach as he
recognised the man towering above him. "Sir?" He
croaked.


"Ha! You didn't recognise me so much last night did you?" The
officer smirked. "I knew I'd find some litter scattered around in that
park if I looked hard enough."


Peter closed his eyes again as the realisation dawned on him.
He took the blanket in his hands and pulled it up over his
head.


"Anyway, nice to see you back so soon Fraser." He heard his
chief say. "I always did have high hopes for you."