Cold Inside

I kinda feel all cold inside,
I wanna run, wanna hide.
Consuming pain, eating me,
Ice for blood, why don't you see?

The mask I wear day-by-day,
It's hiding the fact that I'm not okay,
Blade on flesh, running deep,
Scars that zigzag but never meet.

The rush you feel as blood spurts out,
Exhilarating, an escape from self-doubt.
Shiny surface comfort me,
My soul is dead, let me be.

I can't feel love or hate,
Is this emptiness to be my fate?
And though I laugh, touch and sigh,
In my battered soul, I cry.

I try to find deep inside,
Some proof, that I'm warm and alive.