Dating Channel

The Dating Channel

Natalie is Australian.
She wants a man who watches the Dating Channel.
Natalie is pretty.
She really likes living in London.

Janet lives in Nottingham.
She bakes cakes and collects dolls.
Janet wants a life-long love.
She coughs continuously.

Paul is an IT manager from Essex.
He wants a long term relationship, or maybe a friend.
Paul works long hours.
He's looking for a powerful personality.

Donny is from Streatham.
He works in a bingo hall and aims to look unique.
Donny doesn't like Don.
Donny's girl must be fun.

Stephanie is nineteen and says please a lot.
She walks and adores animals.
Stephanie wants somebody to treat her with respect.
She has a beautiful bundle of baby to share.

Vicky is forty nine and a part-time model.
She likes fine art and travelling.
Vicky likes heavy metal but can't stand jazz.
She must be shy, in silhouette and sunglasses.

Andrew works in Sainsburys.
He is quite friendly and likes Elvis.
Andrew especially likes Elvis.
Andrew went to Graceland with Gran.

Johnnie lives in Trafford.
He likes the performing arts.
Johnnie says 'My Dear' to the camera.
He sings a song to seek his soulmate.

Natalie would love only Paul.
Paul would love only Natalie.
Janet might like Andrew.
Andrew would want Natalie.
Donny would love Natalie, but might settle for Vicky.
Vicky would want Paul, but Johnnie might do.
Stephanie would like Paul, but Paul has eyes only for Natalie.
And Johnnie would wish for Natalie, but be content with
Stephanie.

It's a complicated game played out for us,
When we sit for hours and hours,
Observing like some disconnected panel,
The contestants on the dating Channel.