bra off, tongs on.

I stroll up on to the stage and will myself to stay upright in these
ridiculous shoes. They might not be the easiest kit to walk in ever
made, but my god do they give you a sexy swagger! I walk like a cat
with these on, one foot in front of the other and hips swing. Breasts
bob and I can see them waiting no expression, blank eyes. Just
watching.

With a nod to the DJ on stage I begin. Sway, sway, sultry look, can't
they tell this is an act? Gyrate, bend knees and curve back. Good grief
that man still has his anorak on. Slip one finger into bra strap and
slide it down. Has he no shame? How much closer can he get? Turn around
bra undone and flick it off. I suppose I could feel a little sexy here,
the air feels nice, but then I see them and like a bubble it pops.
Lower chin glance under lashes and caress naked flesh. Did I turn the
curling tongs off upstairs? Shit I don't think I did, I hope no one
puts their costume down near them. Turn around and bend. Last week
Shirley Bryson put a nylon veil down on one and we had to evacuate the
club because of the smoke. It would have been much funnier if we hadn't
had to then stand on the street with the punters. I was ok, at least I
had a long coat but poor Kelly only had a short one and she got shouted
at by the local nutter for a full 20 mins before the fire crew came and
gave us the all clear.

It was odd, the way some of the punters hung around, started chatting
as if we weren't the same people who they had been watching strip
inside only moments before. This funny little fellow next to me asked
me "if I lived local?" and then started telling me about the council. I
do talk to them inside but it's different, out there on the street it
was like he had never met me before. Like I was someone else, some
normal woman he happened to meet. Rather than who I am, the woman who
knows he likes to pant and grunt whilst I dance.

Slide knickers down and push them behind me can't have the little
buggers nicking another pair. One of the fire men asked me out you
know. But I think any guy who asks me while I'm here isn't someone I
would like to be with. Feet together, knees apart and down. He was only
after a free dance I'll bet. Grind those hips; from where anorak man is
standing this must be more like a gynaecological exam than a show.
Caress with wandering fingers, mine not his, they don't dare touch
here. Bruce, the large Maori on the door would break them off if he
tried anything on here. Nice fella Bruce. Been in London ages but still
looks and sounds like a true Kiwi. I do his legal documents for him,
after all no reason to let all that training go to waste. Swing on to
the pole and twirl round. The management don't like too many tricks in
the main floor show, we have to practice in the private shows. Then one
last big forward bend, look at my bum, I think I'll have chips for tea,
then off.