Black and White

Happiness. And again. Colour. I took her in my arms. In the village where I was born, that was where my life was, away from the darkness of which I had just emerged. And that was where I was going to stay. But now I was back. That was until I left. She had been my best friend during my childhood. My sister. I can’t believe it’s her. She looks very familiar. A silhouette appears in front of me. Suddenly a shape can be distinguished in the distance. I can’t believe how beautiful it can be. A wide field, trees, the sun and many flowers showing all the colors in the Universe. So this is what means to truly see. I looked at the flower. I was left speechless for a few moments. I passed the top of the hill. Just a few more steps. With the flower in my hand I started to climb. In front of me there was a hill and I could not see what was behind it. I left the city running, without having any clear direction. I was already seeing the gate. I was not looking at anyway and I did not get any attention. I started to run towards the exit. I realized I could not stay in the city anymore. A feeling of sad and loneliness overcame me. Suddenly I felt different. It was incredible. I had never seen anything like it. I picked it up so that I can look at it better. It was a blue flower. I knew that was how it was called. In my mind the word “blue” appeared. It had color, and I now knew what that meant. It was a flower but different from the black and white ones that could be bought in the city. On the ground, between garbage a flower had grown. It was like a godly light in the dark city. I had seen something and I could not believe it. I suddenly stopped. I took a side-street to try and get to work quicker. I was already running late. I got out the door and looked at the watch. I went down the black stairs of the white apartment building. I wiped my hand. I looked down and noticed I was dirty. I remembered I had recently colored my door white. Pushing the door closed I felt something on my hand. I went out the apartment. I was ready for work. I put on my suit, my white shirt, my black tie. I had already forgotten what I had dreamt during the night. I got out of bed without any mood for it. Unfortunately if I waited any longer I would risk coming in late for work. I did not want to leave. Another dark day in the city was constantly lit by light bulbs. I stopped the clock and looked out the only window in the room. I realized I was still in my apartment. I suddenly opened my eyes.
Something was ringing but I could not see anything around me that could make such a sound.
I was playing with a girl with blonde hair. We were both children and I was just telling her how close I had been to kissing a girl that I liked. Unfortunately I had not had enough courage. She explained to me how I should approach the girl again. She was demonstrating women’s psychology by using the dolls she had received from her parents. I finally understood and thanked her. A few days later I managed to take the step that was huge for me. A few months later the same girl consoles me. Even if I was a child it still hurt. But it did not take long because she told me we should play together and I could not refuse something like that. As a young high school student I kept asking for help regarding the opposite sex only this time I was able to repay her. She was not very good at understanding boys. But together we could overcome any problem. School did not interest us much; we liked the building of relationships allot more. Our village was not very big and so we knew everything that happened there. Our parents thought we were elite students and models to be followed but they were very much mistaken. Still we never failed any classes. We often got out for walks in the forest during which we talked about all kinds of themes or just analyzing the latest gossips. Other times we went out with our “other half” that anyway changed more or less every year. Then something happened in me. It seemed to me like I started to get bored. I did not like the village anymore. I wanted to see the world, to work in the city. She explained to me there was nothing more beautiful. I did not want to believe her. I told her I was not going to be satisfied by a little when I could have so much more. I wanted more color in my life. With tears in her eyes she took her farewell.
It was not like in the city. Everything was not black and white. But there was something strange. I started to dream. I lay on my bed and went to sleep. The suit was at its place and everything was ready. I did my preparations for a good night sleep. I got home from work. The city was the same, only black and white. I walked bored through the streets. Another day was almost over. I was missing something yet I did not know what it was. A strange feeling overcame me. Color. A word came to my mind but I did not know what it meant. I did not know why my head started to hurt. My mind started to work. As I was crossing I looked up at the grey clouds. I was waiting at the traffic lights. I got out the white door of the black apartment building and realized I had not smiled in a very long time. It was night outside, but that was how it always had been.

©Iustin