Modern Day Slavery
I know exactly what I need to do
Yet somehow I keep being pulled back
To the same theme of events and thoughts
An ever-growing and overlapping experience
I'd like to think this is a form of personal enslavement. But there are chemicals coursing through my blood in which I have no say. Legally, I am to be sedated... attempted to be controlled.
There were even counsels of discussions on whether I find myself to be mentally-ill or not. My very character attacked before my eyes by an ignorant and blatantly put, brain-dead psychiatrist.
I had a warning many years ago. In a dream. A euphoric and intimately intense one at first, but had quickly shifted and morphed into a nightmare, a horror of being driven to a "Mental Hospital." I had forced myself to wake-up abruptly. Panicked, heart-racing. But now, I am un-able to wake up.
My life now a fortified nightmare, I yet somehow laugh. When I had momentarily gained freedom. Autonomy of self, this past 2020, how quickly I had forgotten this awful feeling of entrapment. Of not having a say over what goes within my body.
I am pushed to the extreme end of loneliness. People are all around me, but I no longer feel truly at home. Policemen, rampaging into my room on several ocassions. Soon, I take flight. To another land blissfully far away. Where I will seek refuge and most of all, actual freedom.
It will be lonely. Not knowing a single soul. But thrilling. In the sheer ability to make a new life. A new, beneficial way of being.
I have yet to ever truly be, my actual self.
I have yet to understand the power within my mind. Have yet to discover why I'm being hunted. There is natural, then there is supernatural... but therein in these two forms of existences lays something unprecedented and unexplainable:
A consciousness that creates life. Matter and time, simply clay. Maleable. Able to be reignited and given a breathe of life, with just merely thoughts alone.
What then, are dreams, but other forms of realities that we inhabit simultaneously alongside this bizarre but enthralling one we find ourselves...
I have the state of mind of GOD. So although I do experience glimpses of suffering and pain. Of modern-day slavery, I know it is but a learning experience. When I take away my personal struggle as... personal. I see the bigger picture.
The unpredictability of life's many trajectories, has me very, very excited. Who knows where I'll be this time next year. I do.
I will be sure to flee.