Disputing you

even though it's not broken
you want to fix it
even though it's not bad
you want to make it better
even though it's good enough
you want it to be stronger
even though it's fast
you want to make it faster

although you look pretty
you wear make up upon your face
although you laugh to others
you cry tears behind your skin
although you smile at the outside world
you frown at the face in the mirror
although you pretend your life is bliss
you search for peace beyond each open door

despite the fact that you got the promotion
you still feel unfulfilled
despite the clean check up
you still feel a cavity deep inside
despite winning the race
you still live the life in last place
despite the ocean of calm that's around you
you still sail a vessel of chaos

contrary to popular belief
you go to bed angry each night
contrary to the mask that you wear with each other
you rarely go a day without a fight
contrary to the fa?ade you have constructed
you are everything that you pretend you're not
contrary to the bright world you have painted
you create a canvas blue and gray and black

as opposed to death
you could say you were living
as opposed to melancholy
you could say you're gay
as opposed to love
you could say you were giving
as opposed to right
you could say you weren't wrong

when compared with happy
you seem so brooding
when compared with delight
you seem so sorrow
when compared with light
you seem so heavy
when compared with fruitful
you seem so desolate

to a certain degree you are the county fair
but on the other hand, you are a funeral
to a certain degree you are my savior
but on the other hand, you are the anti-Christ
to a certain degree you are the grass in June
but on the other hand, you are the desert in August
to a certain degree you are just beginning
but on the other hand, you are the end.