How to Guide Dogs do it

They know exactly where to go
they take you to the door,
First of all the Butchers shop
and then the General store.
They're never wrong in this respect
they know just what you think,
I wonder if they like the pub
because the lights are pink?

They take you to the bus stop
its canny how they know,
They seem to know the timetable
and where each one will go.
They never catch a wrong one
and know they needn't pay,
Oh! how do Guide Dogs do it?
I hope I know one day!

Invaluable when crossing roads
to get there safe and sound,
and if there's something in the way
they always go around.
When waiting at a pelican
full attention they must keep,
Its funny how they only leave
the pavement on the bleep!

They never do their naughties
on pavements as they walk,
but owners know just what to do
although dogs cannot talk.
They push them in the traffic
"Get Busy" they demand,
Oh! how do guide dogs do it?
I'll never understand.

For treats sometimes they have a run
and frolic in the park,
they never run away you know
they never have a lark.
The whistle blows they come right back
and sit down by your feet,
a Guide Dog that won't come right back
I've honestly yet to meet.

These wonderous feats I see each day
it really is a pain,
because no matter how I try
these things I cannot train.
I try for weeks and weeks you know
I push them all the time,
they never do just what they're told
the naughty little swine.

I see your face that look of awe
as money you are giving,
well dig in deep and give some more
I do this for a living.
Its obvious to see you give
you have'nt worked it out yet,
the more you put into the box
the bigger pay rise I get.