Green insanity

Green insanity

I am told I have a major problem in keeping track of time, and events
and people, though I cannot remember who told me this. A friend
perhaps. Do I still have friends?

I finish my morning shower, and find green clothing on the bed. Its
all green, bright green. Why?

Who cares, on it goes, the green undies, the green shirt. I am
suddenly thirsty and head for the kitchen frig. 'Quite a sight' says a
female voice.

Her smile lights me up instantly, but her eyes are locked on my
crotch. As my jaw drops, she stands, her dressing gown parting, to
reveal naked flesh. I think. You can't stare at such things, but unless
you stare you don't really see them.

She stands, takes me by the hand, and leads me back to the bedroom,
then lays back on the bed, and spreads the gown.

I stare at the bright green trousers, shirt and gloves in which she
seeks my body. Confused I escape to the bathroom.

When I finish my shower, I turn off the light, and with a towel around
me, I cross the dark bedroom to turn the light on. I feel clothing
beneath my feet, then with the light, I see I'm treading on green
clothing, far too small for me, child size.

No children anywhere. I lift the bright green shorts to my nostrils,
and am hit by a powerful scent. Perfume that sets my loins on fire,
well rather excites me. They are much larger than I first thought, and
very stretchy.

My own clothes are gone. Choice of shorts or towel, shorts win easily.
As I pull them on, I think of bike pants, and they make me
hungry.

* * * * *

Off to the kitchen in my green bike pants, stretched to breaking point
on my non-slim frame. Also the wobbly bits get crushed into the front.
Who cares? Well I might, maybe that's why I don't put the light on, but
use the frig light, its bright enough for me.

A red pinpoint comes on in the dark to my right, then I hear the
expelling of breath, and smell smoke... I open the frig wide, and light
spills across the floor and captures&;#8230; her. Tiny orienta,l
naked. Naked but with green underwear. She sees my shorts, and says
softly 'mine'. I lead her to the bathroom, then toss her the shorts
from behind the bathroom door.

When I finish the shower, I dry, then , o no, no towel, no shorts.
Maybe she's gone. Maybe she will scream at my dresslessness.

I open the door, and there she is still sitting on the bed with a man
who might just be a friend. Or a brother, they are dressed for winter
in the arctic. Big anoraks, ski pants, balaclavas and hiking boots. She
hands me coffee in a two handled mug with 'Philip' on it.

Was I naked? Once, I'm sure, but no, not now&;#8230;fully dressed
and rearing to go. We all leave and arm in arm we dance down the road
for a drink in The Statuesque Clippie. Lunchtime and its full. And they
know me. Table after table says 'Hi Brian', but we head through the bar
to the snug.

But I stop. I know my responsibility. Onto a chair then higher, first
a table then the bar. As Ronnie fills middies (I can see Ronnie on his
shirt) I strew bright green clothes everywhere. Lots of cheers, and
laughs. Too many laughs, so I strike a pose like a body builder, which
I'm not. They laugh more, and Phillip stops gathering my clothes, and
sits crying near my feet, which are still bolted to the bar. My toes
are wet. Is it spilt beer? Or tears? Or the shower?

* * * * *

The shower is finished when the police arrive. I think they are here to
lock me away, but I get the utmost respect from them. With them two men
in white coats, who can really run when they have to, or so I find when
I hide behind the green tram.

I am not alone. Holding my hand , the skinny little Asian girl cries,
and says 'you promised me Michael. And you let me down. Let yourself
down.'

'Why do you care?' I say, rejoicing inwardly, because I've always
wanted to be Michael, or Mike actually, I think. Or I think I think.
The others names are completely forgettable. Except for Ronnie. I
rather like being called Ronnie.

I try it aloud as the girl leads me onward. 'Ronnie' says I.

She stares at me. "Shhhh, you know I'm in deep cover.'

'Ronnie' I say, just to hear it said

'Alright, I give up says she, and hands me three blue tablets. I must
want them, what are they. But I do not say that. I smile, accept and
swallow. dry swallow, down my dry throat. I hold back the tears from
the throat tickle. She sees my discomfort.

Then vision clears all round. Spectacles in a tablet.

Memory clears. I am Michael (Hooray for me). I have been Brian ever
since I arrived here, but Brian is not me. His head is scrambled, his
mind bent forever by the cocktails of powders and pills he lives
on.

And I feel Brian returning, with a rush now, and the bright green
sprouts around me, and on me. Ronnie stares at me with pain in her
eyes. 'They should never have let you go&;#8230;'

'&;#8230;so far!' she laments, thrusting me forward toward the
apartments, and up the stairs. I look behind, to see if we are
followed. No one, but worse, I am leaving a trail of green footprints.
'What are you doing?' she gasps as I take off my shoes, and hurl them
down the stair well. I might have problems integrating things, but the
footprints stop. 'Integrate?' Did I say integrate. Not your typical
sick-in-the-head-word. Hope for me yet.

She leads the way through the door, toward the bed, where I take the
towel from my hips, rub a few drops from my hair, and pull my bike
pants up a little higher. I am so tired, and my head hurts

I smell the smoke, not from a cigarette this time. My breathing is
hard, and I collapse to the floor. Flames lick around the edges of the
windows, and the hallway is engulfed by flames.

I will not run. Or jump. I will go where I know the fire can't get
me.

In the shower.