Think of november

5th 0ct 2002

I love October.
I don't think anything daunting has ever happened in October for
me.
I love Oct for the O which is generous, like a perfectly toned mouth
singing in tune. Or an O which stands for the odour of an orange (even
if bergamot is better).

Listen to this ......

july august september october

listen to the rhythm and harmony and then someone has to chime in with
"November" which I think is terrible. Not so much dark as dull, sort of
urine laden and depressing.
If the face of a gargoyle could be scientifically analysed it would be
saying November.

Think of golden leaves all crispy and nice noise under your feet.
then think of wet sludge that used to be some leaves

Think of those tatty old graves you can see under, like stone
tables
and lousy cold blue vases noone's bothered to put any flowers in for
ages
and an old carrier bag blowing about
with a hole in it

Think of Aunty Jean watching to make sure you cried, but then when you
let rip to please her she said
"that's a bit oer the top isn't it"
so there's no passion or grief, no inferno, just Dead Uncle remembered,
a visual memory of his lips in a thin line.
Someone you didn't love, though you agree on principle that everyone
deserves to be. Just he didn't grab you.
Think how he borrowed a fiver off you to pay the milkman a couple of
times but never left you a penny in his will.

Think of going to bed and being so tired you can't wake up enough to
put some extra bedding on
but you keep waking up and feeling the cold and the wall next to the
bed is damp
and you don't know where the bedding is kept and if there's a blanket
in any case.

that's November the bog end of the year