Waiting while hate eats away at me

I sit here alone on a bed;
In a small room with pink walls.
I feel so sad ,so helpless ,so small.

In a few minits I will have to go and set the table for dinner.
I HATE DINNER!!!!!
What HELL will they put me through tonight?
I listen to there voices outside "my" dore, they are talking about me
as usual.

WHATS WRONG WITH THEM!?!?!?!?
Do they think I can't hear them!
Do they think I don't understand!!!!!!!!
They hate me.
They try to hide it but they can't, I can see it in there eyes.

I pretend to be happy, pretend I don't understand.
I where a mask with a painted smile, and my voice I coat with
honey.
They believe my act.
WELL , I hate them too!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!
I disssssssssssssssssssssssspise them!!!!!!

There voices sound like finger nails being drawn across a chalk
bord.
They look like Vulchers clouded in hate.
They smell like sickness and desies.
If I smell ,see or hear them, I run.
I run like the wind!
For all who come in contact with them are in danger of catching there
disies.
That is why I sit in this room alone.
Its not my room, They have lent it to me for a time; and I will give it
back to them sooner, MUCH sooner than they expect.

I reach across to the shelf next to me and pick up a book labled
"FRENCH FRASEBOOK".
I open it and start to read.
But I can't concerntrate.
I know I should go and set the table;
BUT I WON'T!!!!!! I WON'T DO IT!!!!!!!
I won't give them the plesure of watching me work for
them!!!!!!!!!!

I close my eyes, gritt my teeth and try to stop my mind.
But I can't.
Fear fills me.
I am so afraid of them but I don't know why.
I have no reason to fear;
I am imune to there disies.

I'm locked in this cage, this prison of my mind.
Though escape is the key to my freedom, I am too afraid to use
it.
But soon , much sooner than they expect.
I will reach across the room, turn the key in the lock and set myself
free.

Until then I am here; sad and silent.
Waiting...
Waiting...
Waiting for that day.

(THANKFULY I WAS CHANGED TO A DIFFERENT FAMILY ,AND I WOULD LIKE TO
THANK AFS SOUTH AFRICA, CANDICE DEGOTTE AND MY FAMILY FOR HELPING ME
THROUGH A TIME WHEN MY LIFE WAS AT IT'S HARDEST)