Can You Hear Me?

It begins.
Lurch in traffic jam
Over loaded, steaming.
Heart thumps steadily
Quickening a tad,
Hover of butterflies,
Or could be bee’s
Tickle irritatingly inside,
Exasperated passenger twitches
Pick nits, plies, sighs,
So it feels.

Rumbling increases
Intensifies, invisible, but
Coiled tight, squeezing subtly,
Blood pressure rises.
Flex rigid unbecoming fist,
Squeeze eyes tight, blink,
Slam palms on steering wheel
So it feels.

Dormant frustrated volcano
Becomes Mount Vesuvius
Bothered, sweating profusely,
Prickles of hair stand to attention,
Armoured, prepared for bloody battle,
Open car window for air, inhale.
So it feels.

Skin flushed, not with love
Sit up, stiff, unbending
Slowly uncoil, erupting,
Viper strikes, its coming
Composure almost lost,
Jerk car door open
Struggling to grasp,
Begging clean air, gasp,
Stumble sinking, descend,
Fractured knee’s snap.
Break, shatter, crack,
So it feels.

Blast of inferno rage,
Unable to contain,
I open
Spread
Unseal
Rant
Roar
Bombast
Cant
What is desperate to escape

FUCK FUCK FUCK.

I’m screaming,
I can’t stop, CAN'T, shan’t
The fucking travesty of it all.

I don’t believe you heard me at all.

THIS CAN’T BE RIGHT!
Go on, get out, get out,
GET OUT……
Crowding my broken head,
Digesting, confusing distorting,
OH NO not going there,
Valley of abusive nasty notions.
Can’t kill what’s dead.
Bury the thought. FAST.
I think I’m dying, I’m just not dead,
Slip, slid, trip into transgression,
TIED UP
Fuck the armour, shield, slaying sword,
It’s useless without the wall,
WHERE’S THE WALL?
Where’s my guide, my light?
WHY IS IT SO DARK?
I just don’t understand, it was sewn up tight,
Gone, many GONE, gather wall, construct,
Slam the damn door shut,
SHUT, guard insanity,
Moonless, sunless, rayless, lightless.
ECLIPSE
Bowels of eternal ebon, I remain inside.
I realise now, I’m quite, quite mad.

Shush……slip out, don’t make a sound,
Naked, stripped down, I have no wish to be found.