the allure of being lost

something in the way in which
losing grasp of everything &
breaking at the very fibers brings with it a
sense of alertness---
alert to the very fact that you have stepped into the
unknown & the longer that you wander,
the longer you become used to the anxiousness
which comes with that hollow feeling,
as if in the dark, perpetually,
you’ve nothing left to lose &
you’ve no idea what may come next---
plans, like lennon said,
being made while life passes you by,
rot away at the feeling which
tickles---
there is the possibility of everything when
you crawl on your hands & knees
along the rigged rock bottom---
the possibility that it may all end in one crippling,
starving moment,
writhes within you &
the harsh reality of complete absence of meaning
forces you
to create your own.