Diary November 2nd

Well, it's done. I've made the
edits the publishers wanted and this morning I sent off the revised
manuscript of Darts. With any luck it will be published next year. But
more than likely it will be the year after that.

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It's been a good month. Darts
was a finalist in the UK Authors novel competition and was accepted by
a publisher. href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1902852486/qid%3D1099397442/202...">
Serendipity was launched, href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1573442038/qid=1099397513/sr=1-...">
Best Gay Erotica 05 is on the way, and I have stories in the
November issues of Velvet
Mafia and Word Riot.

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I wonder if I will ever make it
really. I dream, the next thing, the next thing, that will be
it.

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I was watching an interview
with Ray Bradbury last night. He was talking about Fahrenheit 451,
talking about the film mostly. 'It gets better every year,' he said.
'Better because the films they are making now are so bad. You watch
them, they are spectacular, but where is the heart? You are aching for
more.'

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Or something like
that.

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Fahrenheit 451 is a brilliant
film. But then Truffaut was a master, and handsome too. I look at the
stills of him directing the film and think, 'You're cute.' That
sometimes seems more important than his obsession with Hitchcock, what
he does with the mise en scene. Perhaps that is just me aching for
more.

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Fahrenheit 451 is currently
available for ?5.99 in Borders.

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My favourite scene in it is
where Montag, the fireman, is reading books. In the society the film
portrays books are banned. Montag, as a fireman, should be burning them
not reading them.

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In this scene Montag is
clutching a big pile of books. It is late at night. His wife wakes up.
She is shocked to see him with books.

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'Montag, what are you
doing?'

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'I want to read, I JUST WANT TO
READ.'

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I know how he feels. Sometimes
with Gary I have to battle to read. When we get into bed he says, 'You
can hug me for one minute and then read for 15.'

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I hug him and start to
read.

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'You don't love me. You love
books more than me. You've had all day to read.'

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Before, I used to read all
night. I was mad for it. I still buy too many books, but with work and
writing and Gary I don't get enough time to do it.

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'You'd like a boyfriend who
worked away and only saw once a month, wouldn't you?'

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Harsh, but fair.

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Today is Gary's birthday. I
bought him some books. This morning we had breakfast in bed and looked
at 'The Good Shopping Guide'. We are both into this kind of thing. We
support Oxfam, renewable sources of electricity, the Co-op and so
on.

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Sometimes I think we may have
more in common than we think. What I think divides us is passion. I get
angry all the time everytime I see something bland.

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Tonight we are going to
Belgrave Road. This is the Indian area of Leicester. At the moment it
is Divali so there are lots of lights, and people and that kind of
thing. We will look at the lights and then go for food.

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Later, we will come home and
watch the results of the American election. I pray Bush doesn't get in
again. I don't think I could cope with that.

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Nor could Gary.

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I will probably shout a
lot.