Chocolate Box Murder

The psychological games played by food manufacturers and retailers are becoming legendary. Extracting maximum profit within the law appears paramount, and food quality seems to suffer in consequence. Sweets lined up at checkouts, shrinking chocolate bars, cheap imports, and greedflation subtly added to a soaring headline rate, are just a few examples of this phenomenon. And substituting cheap ingredients for more expensive options is another.

When I was much younger, chocolates were many and various, including the old favourite flavours of Turkish delight, coffee creme, strawberry creme, cherry cup, orange creme and many more. Nowadays, there is a curious lack of imagination in the basic retail lines. Close examination of the ingredients tells you why. Chocolates in some boxes are based on the same five constituents cleverly permutated to provide 'different' centres. These substances are typically nut shards, praline, caramel, toffee and ganache. In a variety of chocolate moulds they form the core of every chocolate in some boxes.

Masquerade rather than harlequin, you might say.

And not exactly Christmas in 1964.

But then, I was easily thrilled by a new wave of plastic toys, at the time.

I couldn't forsee the bags blowing in the trees, and the takeaway litter, and the dead ducks choked by indestructible rubbish.

And the little plastic balls in all our bodies.