Golden Contemporaries: An Update
By drkevin
- 339 reads
A while ago I mentioned some of the more interesting neighbours I'd had over the years. These included the chap who'd built up an impressive minefield of dog turds in his backyard. These were occasionally piled into the corners with a snow shovel.
He is, in fact, one of my current neighbours, and I thought it might be interesting to share one recent development.
Here it is.
Having completed his minefield (courtesy of the dog), the man could no longer enter his backyard and was condemned to barking instructions to the hound from the safety of his backdoor. Each time, the dog itself circumnavigated the yard clockwise, then anticlockwise, like a well trained circus pony, finishing with a dump in whatever space it could find on the way back in. Imagine my surprise, therefore, when this routine suddenly changed.
I was alerted by a cacophony of noise, which proved to be the man and his brother assembling some complicated apparatus. The turds had been moved to the mountainous corners, and a magnificent tableau appeared before me. One I will never forget.
The visiting brother bent over to fill a binliner with the accumulated excreta, revealing a classic builder's bum down to the top of his thighs, augmented by a rather dashing red thong. When his brother moved into view, he appeared to be resplendent in a pink dress with black polkadots. The scene was mesmerising.
Nevertheless, it should be acknowledged that these two podgy unemployed men were working extremely hard that afternoon.
They were erecting a swinging sun lounger.
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