Pilgrims 2 : Miller
Miller sneers,'my oh my, a real romance’
Bailey says ‘Quit it! You’ll get your chance.’
Yeah, Harry’s come after all.
Gave the South Walk Tavern keys and a gun
to his mortal-sin ugly sister-in-law,
she’s got medals from the First Gulf War.
I says to Miller come on tellum yours
‘Yep, I’m Miller, call me Gus.’
He looks at the faces on the bus.
Through the fizz as his brew’s uncapped
he gives us the joke, an audience trapped.
‘I’m a joker, a riot, ya gotta laugh;
I’m the two-fingered rabbit-ears in your photograph.’
‘This tale’s ‘bout love, but it ain’t romance.
‘S bout, crazy, cripplin’ love and the moony,
loony stuff it likes to make you do.
An if youza thinkin’ nunnavit’s true,
think again, could happen to you.
A cross-town walk-up. Great escape for a gal
like Alison. Six brothers and a drunk for a dad,
two-room flat like paradise, no comparison,
when Daddy loves his little Alison
a little too much.
Okay John is maybe a little mature
but still could be an oil painting:
one a the dark ones painted by a Dutch
the mean money men with eyes like Schulz.
But a creased up face can be real thrilling
‘Specially on the guy that owns the building.
So it’s a happy couple, least for a while
‘til Nick comes to rent with a Brando smile.
Nick studies Climatology at NYU,
treats Alison like she’s store-bought new.
The sweetest ointment has its fly,
For Alison, it’s Abe, the geeky guy.
John doesn’t count, for her or Nick.
‘cause he’s the old fool there’s no fool like.
Nick it seems has got a plan,
he’ll take care of the lovefooled old man
‘sbout a scam 'bout a serious flood
and hiding in inflatables in the rafters.
‘Don’t tell a soul, they’ll think you’re mad,’
He ain’t got a clue he’s just been had
‘I’ll stay up with you, so we’re both saved.’
Oh, she’s slicker than a fish that’s been shaved.
‘Yeah, we’ll float quite safe when the water’s high.’
And the batty old fool doesn’t bat an eye.
Nick and the girl’ll get it on and on,
while nutty Noah’s awaiting the flood.
Abe the Geek’s in building regulations,
He’s been callin round makin’ observations
‘bout the buildin’, the doors and the fire escapes
and Alison’s dress and shoes and hat.
The Geek’s in love, on the night of the 'flood',
the girl’s in the attic, he brings a large bouquet
he’s bearing a gift, you might like to say.
It’s an attic right.
There’s no place to go
But theres a window
‘bove the escape and so
Abe kneels down outside
Wavin’ the flowers
and calls out with pride.
Romantic words like love and bliss
To persuade his Ali to give him a kiss.
The lovers are busy
And dam’ sure annoyed
The whitest,brightest skin
in the air deployed
Abe puckers up for his kiss
and tastes a tang of shit and piss.
Now it’s hate for love and bliss is bitch,
revenge is sure a hellacious itch.
Abe heads home for an oxy-torch,
bides his time in the building’s porch.
Steals like a thief up the fire escape
and waits for the movement of the drape.
It’s an attic right,
there’s no place to go
there’s still the window
to let it all flow.
Nick comes out backwards
and his ass gets lit
the hair is on fire
and he smells burnin’ shit.
John thinks it’s the flood,
Falls from the rafters
With a helluva thud.
Well, the paramedics come and do their thing
John’s arm is broken and in a sling
He gives them the tale, it just sounds mad,
he wears that strait-jacket, just too bad.