F Meetings

Meetings
Everyone's late for a meeting
They're as valued as a turd
Everybody talking
No-one ever heard

Endlessly debating
Whether hot or cold in here
Shall I get the meeting started?
Isn't coffee near?

Items for the agenda
Submitted by you: none
Meaning Other Business
Will run and run and run

Gracefully deferring
As each minor item falls
Rising God-like for the main one
You've got 'em by the balls

Clock digitally ticking
Useful time away
Car parking, toilets, paper
Plain biscuits on a tray

Unqualified attenders
Knowing little of the plot
Are asked for their opinion
We all know it matters not

Pretending all decisions
Are open for debate
When in fact yesterday morning
You firmly closed the gate

Making the right decisions
Not the one's the boss abhors
You'll vote with me on this one?
Or one job redundant: yours

Occasionally consider
Sticking to the point
But all assembled ramble
As if toking on a joint

Meetings for decision making?
Now there's a bright idea
But how many here assembled
Would rather not be here

Ideas? I had a corker!
Yet all my best you spurn
What's your decision chairman?
I'm going to adjourn

The date for the next meeting
Check your diaries please
We'd have it in the Best Room
But someones lost the keys

Let's find a date that suits us
Anyone here want to pick?
Select one: mark your diaries
"Meeting: - going sick"