Cool Guy

This is an original song that I've written myself, and had Suno (AI) make music with. The original text which this is based on was the most unhinged rant I have ever performed! I found it comical, yet true. I reckoned "Cool Guy" deserved a stage (after the makeover).

Also, I'm aware of the AI fear. The hate. The suspicion. What's to make any of you think that I have no used AI to write the lyrics too? Would be real easy, right? Ain't not shortcut to my kinda bullshit, friends. I do one thing, and I do it well. I can write. Not that I've showed anyone in here much of that. I mean to, though. And I'm intimidated by much of what I read from you guys too. It's one thing being able, but it's another to be productive and getting it done, right? I guess, perhaps we all have these thoughts. Still, I wanted to at least make an attempt at proving that I'm the one writing the stuff I claim to write.

That's why I, in my infinite--infinitesimal perhaps--wisdom thought it might be a good idea it let you guys in on my process for this particular piece. All of this whinging probably make this some ridiculous auto-bio, pre-bio or bloody afterbirth of whatever mental concoction I meant to convery! I'm no better you you, baby!

"Cool Guy" really was the most unhinged piece of shit I ever wrote! Why did I write it? I was PENT UP, MAN! I used to have this website, called Hoodling.com, and I shut it down last year (I think). Feel like forever ago. I used to write funny stories. I didn't give a shit who read them, or didn't. For real. I know we all act like that. But, in this case.... I really didn't care. I cared more about whatever became of my "genius" comment on a bullshit YouTube video than that. So, why did I write passionately on that website for over 20 years? I needed an outlet, man. Hate to say it, but I'm that simple. I'm a simple man.

When that website went away, I had nowhere to vent... nor turn. So, I would just open a document and start writing, as it it had somewhere to go. And let's face it, at least the old site was a way "to go!" Without it, I just ended up with a bunch of... ugh... batshit crazy pandemonion in file format, OK? The funny thing about crazy is that it's kinda funny! So, when I started writing musical lyrical a couple months back, I reckoned: "Why not tap into that?"

So, I had the idea of at least attemping to prove to you guys that there's a process here in which you can see where the madness came from. First, below, is the rewritten glory (GLORY, I SAY) of the original, unhinged rant. Bellow the lyrics, since there's space, I have added the original too. Also, if you wonder why I kept the "[tags]" in, it's quite literally a friendly gesture for any one of you who might wanna play around with Suno (the AI that makes music from text) yourselves. You don't need to use my lyrics, but these tags should indicate a good start point from which to explore it yourselves.

[Intro, Spoken]
I’m so cool!
Unbearably cool even.
I cool down lava and scorch minds!

[Verse 1]
The first thing you need to understand...
is just how incredibly cool I really am!
I know, it’s a tough pill to swallow,
because it’s a big, hard, throbbing cool!
I shoot for the stars,
and make a touchdown on the dark side of the moon,
every... single... fucking... time!

I’m just way too cool, man...
only blind people could tell you about it!
They dared gaze deep into my glory,
and chose to never see again,
because they knew they’d never see anyone,
or anything,
cooler… ever!

[Instrumental Break]

[Chorus]
The truth is; you want a cool guy on the throne,
so you can feel safe and sound at home.
You might think I’m a bit extreme,
but in the articles of power,
“cool” reigns supreme!

[Spoken]
The sheer level of “cool” that I possess,
cannot be measured by any scientific,
religious or musical instrument!

[Verse 2]
I’m so Goddamn cool!
The Devil met me at the crossroads,
played his little game,
did his little dance,
rolled the dice,
lost his cool…
and that’s why Hell is on fire, baby!

Some people just heard me say some cool shit,
and lost their fucking minds!
I mean…
obviously they chose to go deaf...
because no other sound would ever “do it” for them again!
They burned through all their senses...
just to bask in my radiant glory!

[Instrumental Break]

[Chorus]
The truth is; you want a cool guy on the throne,
so you can feel safe and sound at home.
You might think I’m a bit extreme,
but in the articles of power,
“cool” reigns supreme!

[Spoken]
I hope you’re catching on…
because I can’t stay long.
I’ve got cool shit to do.

[Verse 3]
That’s how goddamn, motherfucking cool I am!
I walk this world without a shadow,
because no one can follow me!
This is my story,
so take inventory.
My groove melts the sun,
leaving me as your only glory!

Now that we all agree how incredibly cool I am,
kick your own ass out the door,
I’m busy with other shit!
Don’t worry about me...
I’m cool! I’ve got better things to do,
than waste my precious time on you!

[Instrumental Break]

[Chorus]
The truth is; you want a cool guy on the throne,
so you can feel safe and sound at home.
You might think I’m a bit extreme,
but in the articles of power,
“cool” reigns supreme!

[Spoken]
Look, I get it… you stared too long into the sun and your brain got fried,
your bloody ears finally dried up,
and now you’re fuck out of luck!

[Verse 4]
This shit happens to people around me all the time.
Eventually my epic words will be translated into braille,
so that you can feel my presence again,
Without even touching me!
My chilling, vibrant cool,
will still rob you of another sense or two.
Hail to the King, baby.

I’m so…
fantastically,
unbelievably,
courageously,
knowingly,
incredibly,
naturally,
gloriously…
cool, man!

[Instrumental Break]

[Outro]
The truth is; you want a cool guy on the throne,
so you can feel safe and sound at home.
You might think I’m a bit extreme,
but in the articles of power,
“cool” reigns supreme!

[Spoken]
I’m the cool guy!

[End]

Here's the original text (which was never meant to be anything other than an unhinged exploratory into narcissism, and never meant for public consumption AT ALL):

I’m so cool! Unbearably cool even. I cool down lava and scorch minds! The level of coolness, possibly “coolitude,” that I possess, cannot be measured by any scientific, religious or musical instrument! The first thing you need to understand, is just how incredibly cool I really am! I know, it’s a tough pill to swallow, because it’s a big, hard, throbbing cool that shoots for the moon and makes a touchdown on the dark side of the moon every single fucking time! I’m so goddamn cool only blind people can tell you about it, because they dared gaze deep into my glory, and then chose to never see again, because they knew they’d never see anyone, or anything, cooler! Some people just heard me saying some cool shit and then chose to go deaf, because no other sound wound ever “do it” for them again. And you need to understand that for a lot of people it’s both! I’m just so fucking cool, people will burn through all their senses basking in my epic glory! Now that we all agree how amazingly cool I am, I bet your fragile, little mind has a bunch of questions, a crippling inferiority complex, and very likely cultist, suicidal tendencies. Don’t worry about me, I’m used to it… I’m cool. Look, I get it… you stared too long into the sun and your brain-balls are now fried, your wet ears finally dried up, and you’re fuck out of luck! This shit happens to people around me all the time. Eventually my epic words will be translated into braille so that you can feel my presence again. Without even touching me, my chilling, vibrant cool will still rob you of another sense of two. Hail to the King, baby. “Cool” isn’t something you show off, because it’s not an act. It’s something you keep to yourself. True power is best left concealed, because it melts the sun, leaving me as your only glory! That’s how goddamn motherfucking cool I am, and if you disagree… maybe you mind. I don’t, and I still don’t think you really mind at all.

PS:
The only thing that annoyed me about this was that I reused the word "moon" twice. I reused the word "glory" twice (at least) in this new one, which irks my OCD, yet... I must have used the word "cool" 20 times! And, you know what? I'm cool with that, man.

I left the [tags] in for reference, and so that anyone whom wishes to, may use this text to create music with Suno (or other AIs of their own choosing).

Here's the music, if you wish to give it a listen:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5Lr2Tvyxek&list=PLiqpjAMwHGsYBxyFFahm-H...