Craven Danger at the Crossroads - Part One

“Please have a seat, Mr. Danger,” said the woman.

“Thanks,” said Craven. “This is all so new ta me. I’m a little bit nervous."

“There’s nothing ta be nervous about, Mr. Danger,” said the woman. ”I’m going to do everything I can to help you.”

“Good," said Craven. “‘Cause I feel like I’m gonna go nuts."

“Business has been that bad?” said the woman.

“There ain’t no good or bad about it," said Craven. “It’s just ain’t. The phone ain’t rang in weeks, and it’s makin’ me crazy. Our savin’s account is runnin’ low, and me and Betty have been drivin’ each other crazy at the office. The two of us just sit around all day talkin’ to each other on the intercom. ‘What’s goin’ on in there, Mr. Danger?' she’ll say ta me. ‘Nothin’ much, Betty,' I’ll say. 'How’s things on your end?’ ‘I just painted my nails,' she’ll say. ‘Oh, good,' I say, ‘I gotta go blow my nose, I’ll let ya know how it turns out.‘ ‘Okay, Mr. Danger,‘ she‘ll say. ‘Let me know when ya done, ‘cause I need ya ta help me with my crossword puzzle. So, while ya blowin’ ya nose maybe ya can think of a four letter word for bovine. But before ya go thinkin’ about a four letter word for bovine, let me know what a bovine is first.’

“I tell ya, Miss. I thought a plenty of four letter words after that conversation, and none of them had anything ta do with a bovine. I just had ta get away from there for awhile, Miss. I told Betty I was goin' out ta follow a lead. And I decided to come see ya. Sometimes a guy’s just gotta pour his heart out to someone.”

”I’m sure," said the woman. “But not to me, Mr. Danger. This is an employment agency. Not a church confessional.”

”Sorry, Miss,” said Craven. ”I forget myself sometimes.”

“That’s quite all right," said the woman. “I don’t really have much to offer you, Mr. Danger. Since the war ended, most all the good jobs have been going to the veterans. I do have a little something, though. But it’s a job usually taken by the elderly, and it’s a only part-time in the morning and in the afternoon,” said the clerk.

“I’ll take it!" said Craven. “If ya can squeeze me in I’d appreciate it.”

***

“What are you dressed for?” said Sidney. “Don’t ya know know the war’s over? You can put away that air-raid warden uniform now.”

“I ain’t no air-raid warden," said Craven. “And don’t go tellin' Betty about none of this, Sidney. But ya lookin’ at the new school-crossing guard for St. Ignatius elementary school!”

“Don’t tell Betty?” said Sidney. “I’m only sorry ya told me.”