The Dragon of Nottingham - The Kindergartner

There's an audio rendtion of the song at the end of the story. Hope you enjoy.

The Kindergartner

"How about we sing a song?" said Isaac's dad. "Nothing beats the boredom of a long drive to the beach like a good song."

"I know one!" said Isaac. "I learned it at nursery school."

"Then let's hear it," said his mom. "What's it called?"

"From Your Head to Your Toes."

"Sounds like a winner," said his dad. "Go on, then, Isaac. Sing your heart out!"

Isaac handed his comic book to the dragon and sat up straight in his seat.

"From your head
To your toes
It’s all you

From your head
To your toes
It’s all you

You can sing
You can dance
You can giggle
Take a chance

From your head
To your toes
It’s all you

Don’t give up
Climb a tree
Skin your knee

Don’t give up
Climb a tree
Skin your knee

Don’t give up
Climb a tree
Let them know
You’re feeling free

Don’t give up
Climb a tree
Skin your knee

Have a pee
Poop your pants
Hold your nose

Have a pee
Poop your--"
  
“Now wait a doggone minute!” said his mom. “do you mean to tell me that Miss Mac Aninny taught you that song in nursery school?“

“You mean little Miss Prissy Britches?" said his dad. “I didn't think she had it in her."

"I didn’t actually learn it in the nursery school, Dad. But it was close by. It was at the swing-set. There was this new kid there. He’s a kindergartner.”

"Ah," said his dad. "Say no more, son. The new kid at the playground. And a kindergartner, to boot! I remember him well. A different lot those kindergartners. They live by a whole different set of rules. Why, I’ll bet he was chewing gum and blowing bubbles at the same time."

"How’d you guess?" said Isaac. “You've never met him."

"We've all had the new kid," said his mom. "My first new kid was a kindergartner, as well. I first met her at the monkey bars. She taught me the art of the spitball, and how to look dumb when the teacher came to your Playdough table to investigate. It came in pretty handy when I became a kindergartner the next year. I was way  ahead of the other kids in that department. They never saw it coming. My classmates were covered with my handi-work! No one ever suspected it was me.”

“We must sometimes be grateful for the new and older kid, Isaac,” said his dad. “There sage-like wisdom has gotten us through many a restless recess on the playground. We're so glad your first new kid experience was a pleasant one. And now that it's over and done with, you'll carry his shrewd observations with you always. So please continue with the song. It was just starting to get interesting.”

The dragon climbed onto Isaac’s lap and decided to try his hand at singing, as well. He couldn't utter a word, but he could mouth along with the best of them.

"Have a pee
Poop your pants
Hold your nose

Have a pee 
Poop your pants
Hold your nose

Have a pee
Poop your pants
Then go eat
A dozen ants

Have a pee 
Poop your pants
Hold your nose

Blow a fart
On your sister
Go ahead

Blow a fart
On your sister
Go ahead

Blow a fart
On your sister
Just make sure
That you don't
Miss her

Blow a fart
On your sister
Go ahead."

"He taught you well my son," said his dad. "Only don't go singing that to just anyone. Choose your audience wisely."

"Good advice, dear," said his mom. "And why is it getting so awful hot in here? Are you sure you don't have the heat on?"

"I don't get it, either," said the dad. "I have the air conditioner on full blast. I'd better open the windows and let some air in here for a while."

The dragon put his hands over his fiery mouth and looked up at Isaac.

"Maybe you shouldn't sing anymore," whispered Isaac. "At least not in the car. Why don't you go stick your head out the window and cool down."

As they cruised down the highway, the dragon hung his head out the window and let the cool winds wash over him. It was almost like flying. Only, without all that flapping. And it felt wonderful.

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