George and Spider Part Seven - Spider's Story cont'd

'I doubt that!' said Arthur.

Spider looked at him then looked calmly away, for he wasn't prone to rage or even irritation. He continued, 'I started going in. I'd find somewhere to h hide,' he smiled. 'It's one of the advantages of being sm small. I enjoy just hiding and lllistening to the sounds of the home; the voices, the taps, the b boiler firing up. I imagined myself as a small black fly back then, but it dawned on me that I'd never be able to, you know, fl fly - well not properly, so I started to imagine myself as a spider. I could identify with a sp spider - no-one wants them do they?' He looked up at the others who stared back, unresponsive to his question. 'But they're quite harmless,' he continued, ' just d doing their thing.'

'And you didn't steal from the houses?' said Francis, leaning forward across the table, in a probing manner.

Spider leaned back, as if to maintain the previous distance between them. 'No,' he said, shaking his head vigorously. 'Not back then. It wasn't on my m mind at all - but then - there was this one time, I remember it quite clearly. I was inside a house, and just near where I was hhhid, there was a shelf filled with crystal animals,' Spider looked up at the others. 'You know the ones,' he said, 'A little tortoise, with black eyes. My aunty, well she's actually just my - n neighbour, Maureen, she collected those animals - and she didn't have the tortoise, so I took it.'

'Didn't you feel bad?' said Francis.

Spider shrugged. 'No not really. I though I might but I didn't at all.' He screwed up his face as if something profound had just occurred to him. 'I think in a way it made me fffeel more like part of their household, like, because I'd t taken something from the house, I now had a sort of claim on it, a sense of b belonging. I began to take from other houses, nothing big like, just little things, things I could c carry in my pocket, little trophies. When I got back home, those little things, they comforted me. I used to inspect them under the duvet, with a t torch.'

'And shops?' said Francis, raising his eyebrows and speaking in the serious tone of a police inspector. 'Did you take from shops?'

George rolled his eyes and subconsciously bared his white pointed teeth.

Spider remained calm. He took another gulp of beer and simply said, 'No - I hate shops.'

'He doesn't need to, he can take directly from people's homes!' said Winky, following this comment with a burst of raucous laughter which blew a foul blast of his carrion breath across the table.

'So,' Francis clasped his hands together on the surface of the table and stared probingly at Spider who's eyes were bonded, once again, to the orange lights on the games machine. 'No-one has EVER discovered you, hiding in their home?'

Spider shook his head. 'No - I have a sssystem, a thing, a thing that I do.' He turned to George and said, 'George knows about it. It's the method I use, to make myself - not exactly invis invisible, but kind of unssseen.'

'Well, what is it? I want to see this!' said Winky, dipping his huge head towards Spider who shrunk fearfully into his chair.

'It's not like that,' said George.

'No, I can't just do it now. It's not what you think, it's hard to explain.'

George edged closer to his friend and whispered, 'Just tell them how you do it Spider, in your own words. If they don't get it then - who cares?'

Spider looked down at the table for a while, then drank some more beer. He took a deep breath and said, 'I just crouch down - into a ball, I shut my eyes and go deep d down into my head, right down until I reach the the sssource-'

'The sauce?' said Arthur, 'HP or Heinz?'

'Sshshs Dad!' George snapped, 'Spider's sharing this stuff with us. He doesn't have to! And he's got a thing about stuff in glass containers, so don't mention sauce.'

'You what George?'

'Stuff in glass containers, it scares him - well not scares him, it bothers him.'

Arthur frowned and studied Spider all over with his eyes. 'Is that right son?'

Spider was very disappointed with George for divulging this information. He'd been more open about himself than ever but he wasn't willing to reveal everything about himself. He sighed and said very quickly, 'I just have to break them, that's all. I don't go to shops, to sssupermarkets. When I see shshselves of glass containers, I just have to, to smash them, to let the contents out.'

'He's banned from the Co-op,' said George.

'Now please carry on, about the invisibility,' said Winky, 'I'm interested to know.'

Francis looked sceptical now, he half smiled and said, 'Yes - how exactly do you do it?'

'You have to relax your f face. Watch the lights, the lights beneath your eyelids. Withdraw your - your energy from the world, as if back, back in the womb. Just concentrate, f feel yourself, hurtling, hurtling through space.'

'Hurtling through space?'

'There can be no t tension Mr Jules coz tension can fill a room, and squeeze any person who enters it. The air in the room must be light, otherwise the r residents will, well they'll feel it, they'll become alert, if they're alert they'll sp spot you. You have to make yourself relaxed and light, y yes, they might sssee you but they won't react to it, they won't SPOT you, not if you've altered your mind correctly.'

'Crikey!' said Arthur, 'There was me, going to bed, thinking that my room was empty.'

'You have to let your ego go Mr Jules, let yourself dissolve into the at atmosphere, take yourself off the radar. Most people can't do it, they've programmed themselves from a young age to be n noticed by others, they need attention, without it they fffeel unsafe. I learnt as a child to go unnoticed, I had to be invisible just to survive.'

'He's honed it,' said George.

'You must be shitting yourself in case you get discovered,' said Arthur.

Spider shook his head slowly, 'I have no fear,' he said.

'I thought you was scared of sauce?'

'You haven't understood Mr Jules. Anyway I'm alright with sauce, it's just glass bottles and j jars; pickled onions, gherkins and all that, anything in a glass container.'

'Christ! I don't know what to think.'

'George-' said Spider, pointing at George who looked rather worried. 'George, he can't do it, he can't disappear, he won't even try. He won't go into anyone's gaff, he gets the anal twitch just thinking about it.'

'Ah!' said George, 'You get the anal twitch from seeing glass jars on the shelf in the supermarket.'

'I don't ever get the anal twitch. I just have to smash jars - that's all.'

'Ah, that's enough of that lads!' said Fracis, 'I've never seen you two fall out.'

Winky and Arthur looked at each other and started to laugh. Winky was shaking with laughter, the whole table shook with him, although his fused reptilian face hardly creased at all. 'Anal - twitch!' he said between gasps.

Francis had remained quite serious throughout. 'So you're not worried,' he said to Spider, 'about getting caught?'

'No, not when I'm in in the m moment. For me it's the most relaxing thing in the world.'

'Really?'

'Yes - because I'm nowhere, I'm nothing. It's just what she wanted my m mother, she wanted me to dis disappear, and I can, it's what I d do. Occasionally - when I'm lying in my bed thinking about some j job George has lined up for me, I worry a bit. The light beneath my eyelids flashes bl blue.'

'It'll never happen,' said George flatly.

'Let's hope not,' said Arthur.

Francis was still in serious, probing mode. 'And where is your mother now?' he said.

'Oh - she's long gone. Moved to Wales when I was thirteen and I haven't s seen her since. If she turned up on my doorstep now - well, I don't think I'd let her in. The dynamics have changed see - I've got sn snakes.' Spider looked distressed now. The thought of his mother coming back had sent a chill through his body and he juddered slightly, as if withholding urine.

George got up from his seat and squeezed through the little gap at the back of Winky's chair. 'I'll go and fetch you a Coke mate,' he said, patting Spider gently on the shoulder.

'Wait! I'll come, I've run out of fags.'

They walked up to the bar. George pointed to the location of the cigarette machine and Spider walked over to it. He was tipsy now. Gravity resisted him, tipping him back every now and then as he walked. At the vending machine, he crouched down and emptied a load of change out of his pockets. The landlord's niece, the 'mouse' noticed Spider struggling and went up to him to help him operate the machine and sort out his change.

'She was nice, helping you like that,' said George as they walked back to the table.

Spider nodded and said, 'Yes - a very helpful erm, lady.'

'You shouldn't have drunk so much Spider.'

'What's this?' said Arthur.

'You gave him too much drink Dad, he couldn't operate the ciggy machine!'

'Find out her name,' whispered Spider.

George was shocked but also excited by this question, for he'd never known Spider to show any interest in women. But then again, he hadn't seen him so drunk since they were teenagers.

'Time's up boys!' said Winky suddenly, looking down at his gold watch. 'What have you decided about my offer of work?'

George looked at Spider and shrugged, 'I'm in,' said Spider.

Francis sat up in his chair and released a short, deliberate cough. 'It sounds like a big job,' he said.

'No, no, 'said Winky, shaking his head, 'Small job, big reward.'

Arthur looked interested now, 'How much - about?' he said.

Winky exhaled and looked irritated. Perhaps Arthur had broken some benign code of conduct by asking directly about the fee. 'A nominal amount Arthur! You know I will see that the boys are rewarded with an appropriate sum and nothing less!'

'I know, I know, but he's me son, I need to know it's worth his while Winky.'

'He won't be able to buy a house with it - but it would make a deposit, or they could start saving for something, for their first trip to space perhaps. And of course, this work will count towards their experience. They do this cleanly, and there will be more jobs, I could recommend them to others for work.'

'That's what I'm worried about,' Arthur whispered. He rubbed his golden head and sighed. He knew there was nothing he could do to influence George, there never had been, but also he worried about the consequences of saying no to Winky.

'I'm doing it,' said George.

'Okay, you've got my approval,' said Arthur, 'And you can start paying me rent Georgy.'

George shook his head, 'No, I want to build a reptile house for Maxene.'

Arthur put his head in his hands. 'A reptile house? God help us!'

Spider was slumped in his seat now, his eyes were half shut and his face was as white as the moon.

'What's the name of that girl at the bar Dad?'

'Who, Roger's neice? I think she's called Katy or Kirsty or something.'

'The mouse! See, what did I say, she is made for this young man here. If he can stay visible for long enough she may even notice him! They can have little pink baby mice ah?'

'Wake up Spider! You're blowing your chances big time. She's called Kirsty.'

'Kirsty,' said Spider without opening his eyes, 'Kirsty.'

'You know boys, I always say,' began Winky, 'That life is like a ripe peach dangling from the branch of a tree - you can walk away from it, but when you return be assured that it will be rotten, or - you can take a single bite and leave the rest dangling for the worms, or - you can just take the whole fruit for yourself, carry it with you and just enjoy it while you can. The juice of life turns rancid in the blink of an eye.'

George glanced across at Francis who gave a subtle shrug of the shoulders. Spider's head was nodding limply in agreement, but his eyes were completely shut now.

'Er, that's good advice Winky,' said Arthur vaguely. 'You boys should erm, take note.'

'You do this job for me and your lives will improve. The best fish are at the bottom of the sea, and I get the feeling that you two are very good at holding your breath. Spider here will have some cash to take out this young er, Kirsten, or Kir - sty. George can buy a lizard cage or whatever, and my dear friend will get his desired treasure. Everyone will be happy, and everything in the world will be in its rightful and proper place!'

George nodded and said, 'Yeah. We're going to do it. We'll be glad to, won't we Spider?' he nudged his friend to wake him.

Winky grinned and said, 'Excellent!' Then he stood up and shook hands with everyone at the table. He handed the auction leaflet to George who put it safely into his back pocket.

'It's getting late,' said Arthur, 'past your bedtime Fran.'

'I will organise somebody to drive us home,' said Winky, 'I've had too much apple juice.'

'We're alright,' said George, 'Spider and me can make our own way. He needs fresh air.'

'Are you sure?'

'Let em go Winky! They walk everywhere, like two creatures of the night they are.'

'Before you go Spider, are you sure you can't show me your disappearing act?'

Spider turned to Winky and clumsily tapped the side of his nose, 'Indocilis Privata Loqui,' he said.

'You what?' said Arthur.

George grabbed Spider's arm and they walked out of the pub into the crisp night air. Spider pulled his arm away, 'Just leave me now George,' he said gently.

'No way! I want to see you home, come on, it's only a stones throw.'

'No - I ain't going home tonight. I'm going to Sulman's Copse.'

'Sulman's Copse? What the hell for mate?'

Spider looked up to the sky. 'Look up there,' he said, 'it's clear, there's a lot to see. I need to go to Sulman's Copse, I've got a sort of den there.'

'A den?'

'T's what I said. It's just some sticks and that, arranged like a teepee, with a couple of bin-liners on top.'

George looked concerned. 'You'd be better off in your own bed you know.'

'No! This is not a night for going home George. Too much has happened. I feel a great weight has been lifted. I can't just go home and sleep, not now. We either go out on the rob or I'm going to my den for the night.'

George backed away and said, 'Okay mate. There'll be no robbing tonight, it's far too clear and bright, and you're - not as alert as you normally are. I want to get home to Max, she's got some plan or other.'

'Plan?' Spider gazed at the pavement for a few seconds, swaying on his feet. 'You're a lucky man,' he said. 'I wish I had a woman with a plan - or even a woman without a plan. Do you think that - the girl in there - Kirsty, do you think she's got a plan George?'

'Dunno mate. You'll have to talk to her when you're sober. Look, are you sure you'll be okay?'

'I'm fine. I want to witness - cosmic events!'

Spider turned now and began to walk in the direction of Sulman's Copse. George stood still and watched him for a few minutes, until he was just a small speck at the end of the street. Then with a despairing sigh he headed off to the jewellery quarter, to his flat.

The other men were still in the car park. Winky was making a phone call and Arthur was stood with his hands inside his pockets, coasting on one leg, kicking the inside of his foot with the other, then changing legs and repeating the action with the other leg.

'A fucking reptile house?' he said, 'What an indulgence!'

'I know Dad,' Francis agreed, 'You'd better start charging them rent. It's not as if she's not earning, you know, Max.'

'Mmmm, hairdressers don't get much though do they Fran?'

'I bet she gets good tips Dad.'

Just a few minutes later, following Winky's phonecall, a man in a suit drove into the car park on a little moped. He removed his helmet and Winky handed him the keys to the Bentley. Immediately he took on the role of chauffeur, opening the doors for the gentlemen who crashed down onto the cream leather seats in the back. Winky plopped into the passenger seat and the whole vehicle listed under his weight. He lit a cigar, reclined the chair a little and put on some classical music. As the vehicle sloped away, Arthur and Francis felt as if they were floating rather then driving; floating through the suburbs, protected from the riff-raff. The temperature was ambient, the seats comforting, the music soothing. It was rather like an urban womb with five hundred and fifty two horse-power.