everything and you

Cherry

By JoseHdz

Thu, 20 Jan 2011
  • 1280 reads
11 comments
 

Everything seems so correct;
So right:

The quiet way
You take a breath
When I kiss you
On the cheek;

The pretty way
You shift your hair
While staring into
Steaming coffee cups.

Everything seems so true;
So real:

I know that if
We promise
Not to make
False promises

We can enjoy
Each moment
Each surprise
Each charming sunrise.

Certificate U
Love

Comments

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on
I really like the simplicity of this

 

Submitted by JoseHdz on
thank you, insert! it took several drafts but i finally got it to flow, naturally... thanks for the read/feedback, cheers jose.

Submitted by ScoZen on
Jose. Charming poem. I agree with insert. Fingers crossed for more sunsets Regards
ScoZen

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Thank you for taking the time to read, ScoZen. glad you enjoyed it. fingers crossed, indeed. :) cheers

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Deceptively simple...the hardest kind of poem to write, and you excel, Jose. Tina;-)

 

Submitted by seashore on
A lovely piece.

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Thank you, Tina. I am pleased that you liked this one. I agree that it is quite difficult to write a deceptively simple poem; It is worth it in the end, though. :) Thanks for the comment, Seashore. Thrilled that you enjoyed this one!

Submitted by Oldwarrior on
Well done! I am no poet but know it when I read it!

Submitted by JoseHdz on
Thank you, Oldwarrior. I am happy you found it subtly poetic. cheers, Jose.

Submitted by seashore on
Lovely, Jose. Only `several' drafts? I go through forests with most of mine!!

Submitted by JoseHdz on
practice makes perfect :)