RETRIBUTION

Today a woman walked into the station and asked for me. She has changed my long held beliefs and attitudes towards the perceived justice system. For the first time, I want to turn a blind eye, to tell her to go home, live her life in peace and I will forget, against all my principles and at the risk of my career, something I love, forget that I have ever met her. But I cannot forget, she haunts me, draws me in. I want to protect her. So attracted to her am I, that I will forgive her anything and protect her from our justice system, just in case it does her no favours..

As I waited that day for her to be shown up to my office, my mind drifted back one year. A long year, during which I have exercised huge restraint, destroyed relationships in their infancy, because nothing will ever be right or satisfactory again.
Unless, unless ¦¦¦¦¦¦¦.

I have met her before ' that's how she knows my name. The day her husband died I was called to that remote place where she lives, amongst the trees and hills, in isolation.

I arrived at the bottom of the cliff, at the foot of which lay the body of a man. His limbs are twisted and his arms reached out as if trying to catch his soul as it left his body. His eyes are open and milky in death, but there is still a beseeching quality as they are directed toward his outstretched hands. Blood has congealed at the back of his head, a trickle, frozen in time, down the side of his face. A strong handsome face, of a middle aged man. Dressed for the outdoors, strong boots, all weather clothing.

My eyes were drawn to the top of the cliff. There is a woman on hands and knees, her face distraught. Wild, dark hair dances around her face in the wind. Tears roll down her face. Beside her sits a spaniel, it's head resting against her side as if trying to comfort, and gain a sense of security at the same time.

I look to the Sergeant with raised eyebrows, questioning her identity and presence.

"The wife, Mrs. Reardon, if you follow that path on your left, it will take you to the top he said.

With a nod I walked in the direction he indicated, leaving behind the small band of police, paramedics and forensic experts.

I followed a path which wound around itself in endless curves, the incline seeming to get steeper and steeper the nearer to the top I came. The smell of pine needles and leaf mould assails my senses. A wood pidgeon, startled, flies out of a tree, calling it's alarm as I approach. The day is cold ' it is March and this far north spring comes late. The wind is bitter with the remnants of the frost from the night before and there is a promise of late snow in the air. As I leave behind the sight and sound of the tragedy below and the attending humanity in it's wake I am aware of the isolation and peace in this place. Surrounded by the forest, following the well worn path carved out by wild deer over the years, I begin to understand the attraction of living in this kind of place. The sense of freedom it must bring, a retreat from a world that seems to move ever faster and ever more greedily towards it's own destruction.

There she is, still on hands and knees peering down into the gorge. Behind her loiters a police woman, looking uncomfortable, straightening her body when she sees me appear through the trees. I nodded my head in acknowledgement.

I crouched down beside the woman and gently put my hand on her shoulder.

She turned to look at me through large , tear filled green eyes. Her large sensuous mouth turned down, reflecting her misery. Her face streaked with the tracks of tears. The dog nuzzled my arm and gently whined it's confusion.

"Mrs Reardon

"It's Kate

"OK Kate, my name's DI Scot, Steve, let's go and get a cup of tea and get a bit warmer eh?

"Jesus, I must look bloody ridiculous like this, I'm scared of heights, can't stand on the edge she said.

"Its OK I replied, and gently helped her to her feet

On a hill overlooking the scene a man is lying on his stomach, holding a pair of binoculars, which are trained on the exchange.

Go on, cry you bitch he muttered under his breath

A small smile came to his lips "I'll make it all better soon.