Way, way back

Way back in old, olden days,
in stories of Ancient mythology,
The people had gods for every day of the week.
They controlled everything, you see.

There was one for war and one for peace,
and a different one each for food and drink.
The people prayed and begged and prayed some more,
They felt helpless and clueless, I think.

They thought the gods and godesses were all in charge,
that their lives were ruled by Heavens' whim,
But the stories say they got jealous of mortals
and I say the chances for that would be slim.

Sitting on clouds and sipping ambrosia,
reaching perfect fingers toward a gold tray of sweets,
They had beauty and grace, and riches galore.
What could we have that they'd possibly need?

However, there is one God I'd like to berate,
(or maybe to plead for Divine intervention!)
See, it's better to be safe than sorry they say,
and my request is almost too embarrassing to mention.

It's been a long time that I've gone without,
It seems that everyone I know has them.
So, Divine Ones, please, grant my wish,
and bring me someone for great sex, passion, (and orgasm?)

Now, now, I know you're laughing like crazy,
after all, getting laid is really quite easy.
But, you see I want a bit more than that,
and the simple option makes me feel sleazy.

I figure it's better to petition Olympus,
for if the Gods can be jealous, maybe they feel pity as well.
And besides, one never knows who they'll send,
Could be Zeus or even Hercules, one never can tell.

So, dear Gods, on your clouds, with your perfect lives,
just this once, could you grant me this boon?
I really don't think I'm asking too much.
but without you...I may have to take matters into my own hands....and
soon!