Chapter 12 - Together

Aurora was the first one to notice. 
Lumen’s eyes were drained of color. She couldn’t tell what color they were before. But his irises were now a dull grey, as he stared in an abyss she couldn’t see. 
“Lumen?” 
No answers. 
She hesitated. For a second, she saw flashes of countless battles, myriads of empty-eyed warriors. Some lost their minds. Others had lost their fire. No matter why, it was never a good sign. 

“Morgan. Fall back.” Her sharp tone didn’t leave any room for questions. 
“Lumen, are you with us?” 
He was still staring in the distance, mind far gone. 
Taking a step back, she reached for her sword before realizing it was near the fire, where she left it when they stopped. She could still overpower him. He was scrawny, tall, but he never trained hard. 
With a side glance, she noticed Morgan didn’t move. She was standing near Lumen, looking up to him. She should have noticed something was wrong by now. But she stayed. She was still holding his hand, and before Aurora could take another shot at her commanding voice, her constant mumble turned to words. 
“Don’t you dare leave us now, you brat!” She punctuated her call by embracing him. 

Aurora tensed up, ready to intervene and pin him down before he could hurt Morgan. 
To her surprise, he blinked, and deep brown eyes shone again. 
Morgan was silent. Aurora relaxed her fighting stance. More blinking. He was coming back to reality. And it was painful. His haggard face telling of the internal suffering he was going through. 

“A—” 
“Don’t leave us. Please…” 
It was the first time in a long time Morgan used that word. She was a woman of few words, and the rare ones were condescending and degrading. A wave of emotions washed over Aurora as her friend was on the verge of tears. Her other friend was fighting an internal battle to regain his foothold on reality. It wasn’t the fight she had trained for. But she couldn’t leave them alone.
A glance from Morgan finished convincing her, and she took a step forward, closing the gap with Lumen, resting a hand on his shoulder. 
“We won’t let him go. We need him, and he needs us. We don’t leave a comrade behind!” 

Lumen’s breath slowed down, his blinks spaced out. He wasn’t fully back yet, but he was emerging from this trance. A curious man, but a comrade, a friend in need of help. If he could accept it.

Stop him! 

The void is full of angry voices. Vehement. Emphatic. Compelling. 

STOP HIM! 

Shouts, loud, aggressive, relentless. 

STOP HIM! 

Stop him. I’m one of them. I chant it with them. Stop him. 

STOP HIM! 

Stop him. I know what must be done. Through the cacophony, I imagine myself back to the camp, Heilig leaving me, Morgan ignoring me, Aurora disappointed in me. 
They don’t want me. They need me for the prophecy. But they don’t want me. 
They’ll drag me there. They don’t care about me. Only about the prophecy. 
If my corpse was enough, I’d already be dead. 

STOP THEM! 

Like all of the other me. The betrayed ones. The forsaken ones. The unlucky ones. Those who fought back. Those who obeyed. Those who didn’t even have a say. 
Is this world worth it? The harsh, cold, uncaring world. All those friends who left. Mom. The only one who saw me for who I was. Gone, like the rest of them. 
I’ve always been alone. Used, abused, and discarded. 

STOP THEM! 

My only solace was the voices. Overwhelming. But familiar. They want the best for me. The best for us. 
They know how it always ends. Everyone leaves. But them. There’s always more of them. More of us. More of me. 
I can surrender to their embrace. I can— 

“Please…” 

A faint voice. Nearly a whisper. But strong enough to stand apart from the chanting crowd. 

STOP THEM! 

“Don’t leave us.” 

Don’t leave me. I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to be alone. The voices are the only ones who’ll stay. Everyone else will… 

“Don’t you dare leave us now, you brat!” 

That voice. Morgan? Her scream silenced the other voices. Like frightened critters, they hid in the recesses of the void. 
Colors. 
Dark and muted, but colors. Trees. Moss. Night sky. 
Sounds. 
Not the voices. Crackling fire, rustling leaves, an owl in the distance. 
Smells. 
Acrid fire smoke, appetizing roasted meat. 
Touches. The warm embrace of a body. Small, but clinging to me, never to let me go. A weight on my shoulder. A hand. A friendly hand, grounding me.

Lumen snapped back to reality. Brutally. Off-balance from the short girl hugging him, he fell backward. The hand on his shoulder didn’t let go. 
In a loud commotion, all three fell. 

A sharp pain in his side cemented Lumen to this reality, as his wound reopened. Morgan didn’t let go and was now on top of him. 
Aurora had fallen to his side, still grabbing his shoulder. 

stop them… 

The voices were distant. Kept away by the two women. 
Lumen let out a giggle. Nervous at first, it quickly turned into a hearty laugh, soon joined by Morgan and Aurora. 
Alerted by the crash, Heilig had turned back and was now laughing too. Not to mock them, sprawled on the ground. But joining in that uncontrolled display of joy. 

He helped them back on their feet, and, without exchanging a word, they all went to the fire to get the meal they were long due. 

The laughter faded, and none of them wished to break this magical moment by bringing up what nearly happened. For an evening, Lumen relaxed. He wasn’t alone. They were here. 
Aurora helped him patch his wound after they had their fill. The knife had been put away shortly after the rabbit was cut. With a lighter heart, exhausted, Lumen slid in his sleeping bag; he wasn’t alone, and he fell asleep with a slight smile.