As The Washer Turns

As The Washer Turns

Man, I am so tired of this - twisting and turning, spinning and
rinsing. Does anyone ever stop to ask me if I want to be stuffed with
smelly socks and underwear with skid marks? NO!

It's the same thing - day after day, week after week. I get dirty
clothes stuffed into my belly, I have to fill up with water and
dissolve that darn pasty detergent or spread that liquid stuff and then
twist and turn, twist and turn, over and over and over again. Then I
have to spin and spin and spin and get all the water out. But it's
still not over for me! I have to fill up again and get some more liquid
stuff dumped in on the wet clothes and then twist and turn and twist
and turn to rinse the doggone detergent out of the clothes and get the
other liquid stuff worked through them. (I should be skinny as a
cotton-picken' rail by now.) Then I have to spin and spin and spin and
get the water out again! Whew! I get dizzy just thinkin' about
it.

Half the time they overload me and I try to tell 'em by making
disagreeable noises. But mostly they ignore it and it breaks me down.
Then they wanna blame me! What's up with that! If that pasty detergent
doesn't rinse out properly, they blame me. Huhhh! It's because the
dodos put too many of their nasty smelly clothes in my belly. Whadda
they think I am? I can only hold so much!

Ya know, I think I'll go on strike. Yeah, that's it! I'm on strike.
I'll show 'em!

Here we go?they're putting their dirty duds in my belly again. I'll let
'em think all is well. Ok, they've filled me up - more than filled me
up, as usual! Here comes the water. Chugga, chugga, chugga. I'm
twistin' and turnin'. Ok, they're gone now. I QUIT!

"Honey, the washer quit in the middle of the wash cycle."

"Well, try pushing in the dial and pulling it out again."

"Didn't work."

"Ok, let me take a look."

He's unplugging my cord and plugging it in again. Hehehe. I'll start
back up until he goes away. Chugga, chugga, chugga.

"Seems to be okay now, Sweetie."

Gone again. I QUIT!

"Honieeeee. I thought you said the washer was OK?"

"It was working when I was there a minute ago. Try unplugging it and
then plugging it back in?"

"Ok Hon. Oh there it goes."

Chugga, chugga, chugga. Toddle on now Sweetie-pie. That's a good
girl!

I QUIT!

Darn this thing! "Hon, this washer quit again. What's wrong with
it!"

Just tired, ma'am. Just tired. Dontcha' ever get tired?.?

"I guess we'll have to call the repairman, Sweetie."

HEHEHEHE!

"I don't understand it ma'am. There doesn't appear to be anything
malfunctioning. I've checked the cord, the machine, the drum.
Everything. It works fine for me. The only thing I can suggest is
changing out the computer unit if the machine continues to malfunction,
and that is quite costly."

"Hmmm. I see. Well, I'll see if it works now and if not?maybe we'll
just have to get a new one and throw this one in the rubbish
heap."

Rubbish heap?that doesn't sound good. Although it might be restful.
But?I'd probably get rusty and birds would use me for a bathroom and
it's cold and wet out there.

Chugga, chugga, chugga?.