I want to show I'm Sorry

I want to smash all the windows
I deserve to be covered in blood
Putting my fist through a brick wall
Would probably do me some good.
I feel like throwing myself of a building
I deserve to break all my limbs
I wish I could be in a box in a church
Listening to my family singing hymns.
I want to be in such pain
Maybe I should get a knife
and scrape off every last piece of my skin
A disgusting end to a disgusting life
I want to jump in a lions den
and be ripped up piece by piece
I want bad things to happen to me
So I quickly decease.
Because I feel guilty
of something I've done.
And the only way to feel better
Involves a knife or a gun.
But instead of jumping in front of a lorry
Maybe I should just say sorry.
It maybe will do no good.
But it is better
Than being covered in blood.