M

M. was born Hollywood royalty.
M. hasn't returned his agent's calls for over two months.
M. has suddenly "lost his taste for Buddhism."

All M. wants to do is drive around in my car and snort cocaine.

Three weeks ago, I answered my cell phone and it was M, frantically
insisting that I meet him at an address I didn't recognize...

At the meeting, M.(and his 27 year-old lawyer) strong-armed me into
accepting the responsibility of parceling out M.'s possession "should
anything happen to M."
("Not one red fucking dime to my mother's family!")

M. has accrued $530 worth of fire-hazard fines from the city; if he
doesn't hire someone to clear the foliage, one spark could send the
entire canyon and hillside up in flames.

M. smokes in bed.