Parents CAN Work At Home

Did you hear about the lady who had two teenagers, a kindergartener,
a preschooler, two large dogs, three cats, a man, and she tried running
a business out of her home? She went crazy; killed her husband, the
dogs ran off with the kids, and nobody has seen the cats since. Now,
she writes country songs from her cell in Leavenworth; all titled, "It
Ain't Amway."

Not really.

I'm a writer and all my work is done at home. I have a large family,
but so far, I'm still sane. I think. At first I found it very
challenging to find time to work uninterrupted. Through trial and
error, and with some advice, I have found ways to buy time, SOMETIMES.
You have to be creative. Since kids are involved, I asked them first,
what they think a work-at-home parent should do if the kids wouldn't
leave them alone. Here are some of the responses I got:

Mollie, 3 years old, said, "When my babies won't leave me alone, I slap
them on their head until they shut up!"

Brandon, 13 years old, said, "I'd make sure they had a big pile of
toys, coloring books, and snacks."

Brett, 5 years old, said, "My dad can use his notebook, and I get the
computer. He gets to use it when I take my nap."

Sharon, 11 years old, said, "If you play with us when you're not
working, we won't be so bad when you're busy."

Kids will answer all kinds of grown-up questions, and sometimes they
come up with some pretty good stuff, like the last two.

The following ideas will only work with some families. Most teenagers,
for example, are unpredictable and there's only one thing that works
with them every single time; bribery. Knowing your family as you do,
take what you know will work on them, and apply it.

GET READY

First, do the things that could interrupt you, if left undone. Set
drinks for the kids in the fridge, do the housework in case of drop-in
company, go to the bathroom, and get your coffee or refreshment of
choice.

Put those dogs in the basement or equivalent space away from you. It's
really a drag when I'm working and I have to keep running to the window
all the time, yelling, "Shut up!", so I keep my dogs in the house.
Unless your neighbors like your dogs, in which case you can leave them
out.

Turn off the ringers in your phone and use your answering machine as
your secretary. Leave a message on there that says you'll only be
taking calls between this hour and that hour, and when you're finished
working make sure you answer and/or deliver those messages. Caller ID
is really handy for this; you can know who it is without answering.
Also a service that's really handy is one they made for families with
teenagers; a different number that rings on your phone, only with a
distinct ring, so you can tell if it's even for you or not. Only give
this number to people that would make work related calls to you. It's
cheaper and easier than installing another phone line.

Have your strategy to keep the kids busy while you work planned out
before you're ready to begin. Don't wait until the last minute to
decide what they'll do, because it won't work. Never forget Murphy's
Law: If it can screw up, it will, or something close to that.

Here's a twist on the Working Weekend strategy: Warn your family that
the coming weekend is Working Weekend and then make a list of the 5 or
10 most hated chores at your house. Tell the family that everyone must
pick two chores and initial them, making them responsible for that
chore. But, whoever picks number 5 (or whichever you choose) only has
to choose number 5 and no others, because that one says 'Take the
little ones out for the day'. If everyone chooses number 5, that's
cool; it's what you wanted anyway. You can have Working Weekday later
to get those other chores done. :)

Don't forget about the dishes, if the little ones have nobody to take
them out for the day; remove all sharp objects, put a chair and a towel
at the sink and let the small ones 'wash' dishes. They love to do
dishes before they're old enough for it to become a chore to them.
Plus, they like it when they feel like they're doing 'grown up' things.
A spray bottle filled with water and a sponge is tons of fun, if you
make sure you tell them what they can't clean, first. It'll buy you at
least an hour.

Chuck, a twenty-nine year-old single father plays house with his kids
while he works. "Make sure you get to be the parent that works outside
the home," he suggests. "I always play the mom and I have to go to
work. While they're playing I keep an ear out to 'watch' them, and when
they talk to me or interrupt me, I say, ' You can't see me, I'm at
work.' In their pretend world, they naturally understand, and it's good
for an hour or two."

One thing I did when I was still nursing a baby, was get one of those
frontal packs to carry them in. Mine had a zipper inside, so I could
nurse her at my desk without putting everything down to hold the baby
and try to work with one hand. Mine had a draw-string cover on it, so
nobody could see if I didn't want them to.

If your business allows it, you could stay up later or get up earlier,
working when the house is quiet. This interferes with your sleep
habits, but it's the best time to work at home. The phone doesn't ring
and the house is so quiet, it makes tapping your keyboard sound like
you're being loud. However, if you've never strayed from your sleep
patterns before, you may be in for some rude awakenings. To prevent
this, keep this in mind:

One late night = tired the next day.
Two late nights = cranky the next day.
Three late nights = husband makes me take a nap with the kids.

DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME

Don't bring home movies for the VCR unless the kids have asked you to.
Sometimes they just don't feel like watching TV. I brought home movies
when the kids were in this mood, once, and the movie only distracted
them from rough-housing. I had to keep running to the living room all
the time, yelling, "Get off that! No punching!" I finally put them in
the basement with the dogs, and they played happily for three hours! It
worked so well that I tried using it on another occasion, but now for
some reason the dogs won't go into the basement anymore.

Don't have the kids sit at the table with you while you work, no matter
how many crayons or cool books you've bought them. They'll want to see
what you're doing, they'll ask you how to make letters and spell words,
and then they'll want to show you everything they do.

PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN

Just because you work at home, people will assume you are always off
work or that you don't really do anything. And, they will interrupt
you. Put a sign on your door that's one of those little clocks that
says, "I'll be back at X:00". They sell them at Hallmark, J.K.Gill's,
and other paper products stores, or you could even make one. Then, when
your neighbor says they knocked on your door and you didn't answer,
tell them you can't hear the door when you're working and that's why
you left what time you'd be available. It doesn't offend anyone, and
you get time. Soon they realize they can't reach you until you're off
work, and won't try.

PUT THE OTHER FOOT DOWN, TOO

Set up your workspace away from the hub of family activity, if you can.
Have dinner made so your mate or older child can throw it in the oven
to heat up when it's time. Leave a list or chart of bed-times and
routines that need to be followed, and then tell then you're going to
work. Kiss them good-bye and go to your workspace. And, pay no
attention to the sounds that you may hear coming from the other side of
that door! They will do anything to get your attention, from
exaggerated injuries to trashing the house; they can be ruthless, so be
firm and consistent. It'll become routine for them, eventually. This
way you can also set up your days off and a complete schedule will be
easy to keep.

At home, you should have short work hours, or break it up so that the
last set of hours is after the kids' bedtime. That way, you reap
benefits of both working at home, and being with your family
more.

Think of a flexible schedule as one that can change if you need it to,
but not one that changes daily, or you won't have a schedule at all.
Work steadily, regularly, and be creative in finding ways to make the
time.

I wouldn't suggest slapping the kids on the head until they shut up,
but play house if you have to!

And good luck!