Shauna Woo 4
Where had I entered the world? Was this a world of utter darkness? Where was I?
It was like I was going through a tunnel of utter darkness. I could not see where I was or where I was going. I was lost. Was this freedom? Was this where I had longed to be? I stretched out my mind, looking for the hand of God. Was he really there? Is this where I could find him? I stretched out my hand.
-Is that you, Shauna?
-It is me, Lord. What is my mission in life? Why have you sent me to utter darkness?
-You were trying to find yourself.
-Can I only find myself in utter darkness? How can anyone do anything in utter darkness?
-Why do you ask so many questions?
Why was I asking so many questions? I could feel the firm hand of God raising me out of the darkness. He clothed me and then fed me.
-You were hungry.
-Thank you for the food. Where am I? The sun was exspecially bright.
-Why am I so unhappy? Inside, I am a huge mess. I don't know what's happening to me. I am being torn apart.
-What's tearing you apart?
-I have done all the right things for my parents... I feel completely empty inside and this emptiness is tearing me apart. Is this right? It doesn't feel right? I feel like I'm in hell, that is my soul.
-If you go out into the world alone, you will fear utter darkness.
-I've already felt utter darkness. Is this good?
-You need to purge yourself of yourself. Then you will understand.