Why is he trying to kill me?

this king
whom i served so well
does he not see
all i did i did for him?
he is much taller than i am,
his stature
something to be spoken for and even
worshipped,
i am a small boy, a shepard,
who fought with lions and wolves,
who likes to take care of my men.
i struck down those who were afraid
of no men.
i struck down those who had no fear of the Lord.
it's true, i loved the praise and the applause.
he had struck down his thousands and i
my tens of thousands.

and his daughter,
she had such wave-like hair
rolling upon the shore
of my belly
refreshing me with songs.
and his son,
he loved me too.
we wept such tears, we were
brothers
soul-mates
inseparable.

no one likes to be second.
i don't know how i became so prominent.
it was all the Lord's doing.
even when i was in danger's shadow,
he protected me,
but the people loved me more than the king,
they loved me because they no longer feared the Philistines,
because they found themselves favored
by God once again.

i don't know.
why he hated me so much except that
he could not obey God any longer...
he believed that he had done it all
and when it all disappeared,
he no longer felt...

he found himself hated by his own family,
He had made himself crazy with homoerotic envy for David.
He no longer saw any enemy but David,
the Lord's anointed.