She Didn't Say

None of us expected her to die like that. She was one of those people you thought would live forever, you know?

It wasn’t a noticeable difference, but it just wasn’t the same without her. No one’s heart shattered at her loss. No one felt a thing. But there was a change from the day she died, onwards. Not a huge one, but people noticed it when it hit them one by one.

Her parents were the first, and then her brother caught cheap vodka in his eye. It rippled slowly through the school and then the town whispered with the passing wind that a girl had gone. We still hear her voice.

We saw her that day and she smiled like she always did. The Sun was shining as she waved and walked away; her parting words - “I’ll see you later” - had not left the air before she had. She’d always had her mood swings, but her smile that day was genuine. No one knew what could have gone so wrong.

It should have been the happiest time of her life. No one had ever seen her smile or laugh or walk with such confidence in her step. And she’d never looked so beautiful on the outside, we had said.

The change wasn’t sudden, so nobody noticed as her gaze drifted slowly downward, when her eyes became mournful of nobody's loss. No one noticed when the sparks in her voice began to crack as her smile faded out and her life and personality followed.

“It’s so hard,” she didn't say, “the air is too bitter, outside. It hurts my lungs to breathe it.”

The colour in her eyes grew darker as the war raging in her mind grew stronger. Her heartbeat raged, though she couldn't find the energy to move, physically paralyzed and mentally unstable. Her skin sank slowly inwards and soon she’d mutter no more than a hiss outside her world of empty struggle.

“It’s so hard,” she didn't say, “the wind is too strong, outside. I can hardly move at all.”

She slept for a year and when no one came to her side, she slipped into a conscious coma. Doctors and specialists flooded to her side, their jargon drowning out her pleading cries for help.

“It’s so hard,” she’d say. And she’d say no more.

She smiled for the last time the day that we saw her. She didn’t say much, for she’d already bid farewell to the world. Nobody likes long goodbyes.

None of us expected her to die like that. She was so beautiful, once.