Shit Happens
By wandelaar
Thu, 04 Feb 2010
- 1769 reads
6 comments
It was raining a deluge
when I cracked open the blues
My coins were gone where?
Maybe down the loo
the heater glared with an ice cold flue
my legs froze hard in my pantyhose too
But hell, shit happens
My coat was still wet from the evening before
The cab gave me a water wave as an encore
I spat green snot out and my face turned bright blue
But hey, who cares, shit happens
I arrived at my work ten minutes too late
My colleagues were busy,
I was turned back at the gates
home once again and my bread walked away from my plate
But hey , who cares, shit happens
The bar was jumping
When I turned up for my date
My boyfriend was humping my late best friend Kate
He took a look at my face and decided to skate
But hey, who cares? Shit happens
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Comments
Nice sort of modernistic
Permalink Submitted by Timothy Poole on
Nice sort of modernistic poem. They'll look back at this one in 100 years and think "so thats how they spoke in those days!"
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I really like this
I really like this wandelaar. If i could maybe suggest you lose the "maybe gone down the loo". To my mind it doesn't really fit the mood of the rest of the poem. I would leave it at "My coins were gone where?" but I can hear a line like "They disappear as biros do".
Enough of what I think though, this is good stuff.
Kheldar :--)
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Some of the lines in this
Some of the lines in this are great, the panty hose and cab lines. Found little bits of the rhyming a bit clumsy but loved some of the images ... and haven't we all had days like that? Bit reminiscent of, Honey I'm Home, by Shania Twain.
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new wandelaar Good like bit
Permalink Submitted by Cavalcader on
new wandelaar
Good like bit coins down the loo
can happen. I think all get days like this aye!
Expressed yourself well true to life sometimes
oh! I see cherry! now congrats:
julie x cavalcader (:-
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