Sieges of castles, hearts and senses

Tonight, please let it be tonight
Let us come together again, all coincidence.
Haunted by you since that night, months ago
Ghost, you are a friend of a friend, yet some call you fiend
I call it misunderstanding. Crossed wires with crows cawing on them.

How can you be so unknown yet so familiar?
Rationality packaged, gift-wrapped, in sentiment and poetic thinking.
You embody an oxymoron.

I want you. I think you might want me too.
There's a glimmer of a shine, a hope held back.
Yet even if we succeed, fate's decisive hand would tear us apart.

Not love. Oh, please don't let it be love
Grant me a crush, an infatuation of sporadic origins
Or lust of the flesh born anew in the twilight hours.

And now I fear that I'm deluded; wishful thinking
Born of kind natures and kind words,
Directed at me for one instant.
At last, the wallflower's counterpart.

But, no. You are just another man, same as the others.
You would use me to entice your way into my favoured friends affections
So I declare no more! I don't want your torment,
I don't want more heartache.

I need to leave you behind before you leave me behind, in pursuit of knowledge.
My heart will be my castle, my fortress. I will defend it until my senses surrender, or until I submit.