Haiku - Daffodils.

By D G Moody

Fri, 17 Mar 2023
  • 217 reads
7 comments
 

Daffodils surprise

arising out of black earth

as Spring now rises

      

© D G Moody 2023    

(Image courtesy of Sarah Lou, Altphotos)                

Certificate U
Poem
Haiku

Comments

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Good. The shock from short says more than wordy! A lovely shock those daffodils to all who are tired after winter — trumpeting! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by D G Moody on

As always your comment is appreciated and an encourgement

Blessings....Dougie

D G Moody

Submitted by Penny4athought on

Yellow, Flower Trumpets, heralding spring, the beautiful daffodil. A nice poetic tribute.smiley

Penny4athought

Submitted by D G Moody on

Thanks for the words of appreciation, always welcome.

D G Moody

Submitted by Tom Brown on

Know the flowers just didn't know it's daffodils. Beautiful contrasts, these small poems are a great art. Were they origianally chinese? I would have said "spring rises". While we're heading for winter.

Keep well! Tom

 

Submitted by D G Moody on

And glad you liked the poem. I take your point, regarding - rises instead of arises; looking back at the poem (a Haiku), I can see how arising and arises may be too close. The strict Haiku is a 5-7-5 sylable three line. But I can revise the last line to still keep it as five syllables; I'll look at this - thanks.

Best from Old Blighty.......Dougie

D G Moody

Submitted by D G Moody on

Just changed it, with the third line.

D G Moody