Blackmail.

It is good to go to the dentist on a regular basis. It is good to go to the to have your eyes tested, every year or every two years. I go to the dentist every 6 months; I have had the same dentist venue since I was 14 and now, I’m in my 60’s. I also have my eyes tested every year.

My Mum will be 90 next month. She lives in her own flat. The flat is in a building with 60 other flats.

My brothers and I and the paid carers, look after Mum who has dementia. I am the one, that takes Mum to the dentist and the optician. To do this, is hard work! Nothing can be done fast; it takes lots time and planning! Now that Mum has a wheelchair, that is a godsend. Before the wheelchair, it was slow steps to everywhere, to the lift, along the corridors. Even though Mum now has the wheelchair, the hardest part is getting Mum in and out of the car. Is it a leg in first or bum on seat first? Either way, it takes Time. Getting out, takes even longer. My brother William his car is sporty and low, not ideal for a soon to be 90-year-old, my car has seven seats and is much higher, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I always dread these times, of getting Mum to her appointments.

I remember three years, before Mum moved to her flat, to have her eyes tested was a nightmare, as it was in the middle of the Town centre. I had to find a parking space, and then what would take me 5 minutes to walk to the optician, it would take us more than 30 minutes, with Mum clinging on to me, and me trying to look brave and strong. Really if Mum fell, she would have took me down with her, as I am not that strong, I would have protected Mum with my Life! Thankfully that didn’t happen, but about 7 years ago, while up Town with Mum she did miss the step up to the pavement and fell, I screamed, Mum was not hurt at all.

When Mum moved into her lovely flat, Willian suggested a better for parking, optician. It was perfect, with just 3 steps from the free car park to the optician.

The small optician that has just two Staff, the lovely lady on reception and the lovely man that does the eye test. Two years ago, when Mum had her eyes tested there, he informed me, “Mum has some cataract, do you want us to refer her?” I replied, “No, I will speak to my brothers about it.” Personally, I didn’t want Mum to have it, but it would not be up to me, but up to the majority.

A few months the dreaded letter arrived, to let me know, Mums two yearly eye test was now due. I wasn’t looking forward to it, but while I was pondering when I was going to pluck up the courage to take Mum, one day while in her flat the manager spoke to everyone on the Tannoy and said, “All those who has booked to have their eyes tested, in the communal hall, the optician, is now here and downstairs.” I know Mum hadn’t booked in, as we didn’t know, that there were home visits. I left the manager a note a few days later, to ask her for the contact details so that Mum can have her eyes tested downstairs, the very thought of that sounded like – AWESOME!

Time went by SO quickly, but eventually last week, I rang the company. I said, “Are you due for a visit here, or do you do individual visits?” The lady on the phone said, “We are not due for a visit, but we do individual visits.” I asked, “Would the eye test be free?” She said, “Yes,” I asked, “If Mum needed glasses, off the top of your head, how much would the cheapest glasses be?” She said, “Is your Mum on benefits?” I said, “No, Mum is not on any benefits.” She said, “Has Mum got diabetes?” I said, “No.” She tapped on the keys of her computer, and said, “Does your Mum wear varifocal lens?” I replied, “Yes,” She tapped again on her keyboard and she said, “The cheapest with lens and glasses would be “Three hundred pounds.” I nearly fell off the floor! She wanted to know, “Do you want me to book you in for a date?” I said, “I will ask, my brothers and get back to you.”

I then rang the small company with the free car park three steps away from the door and asked, “In reply to the letter, that you sent me, can I book Mum in for an eye test?” She said, “Before we can do the eye test, Mum would need to be referred, from us to go and get her cataracts removed first.” I said, “OK.”

The impression I got, two years ago, was that the cataracts, was not bad or serious. Mum can see the smallest detail, two years ago and now.

I worked with a fab worker, she retired age about 83, she was our best worker, she has had both her cataracts done, even after she retired.

Paul wonders if Mum is too old to have hers done. My brothers have not replied to me yet.