God Is Not Just A Weather Man

"Let me get this straight. The only thing you have any influence
over on this entire planet is the weather?" The CNN presenter adjusted
his spectacles on his nose and looked at God inquisitively.
"Let's not underplay that," replied God, a little defensively as he sat
under the bright studio lights idly playing with his thumbs. "The
weather can be and is very influential. For instance, when was the last
time the weather affected your life?"
The CNN presenter looked up at the camera, "Only last week my flight
was re-routed from JFK to Pittsburgh."
"And why do you think that was?"
"A heavy lightning storm over the airport meant we couldn't land.
"You're forgetting the man in seat 142D who was on his way to Jersey to
be killed by his brother."
"And you caused that storm to prevent this from happening I
suppose?"
"It's a little more complicated than that, but essentially yes"
"And what of all the other people on that plane who had their futures
altered that day?"
"They weren't exactly bad people and nothing too adverse was going to
happen to them. You have to weigh up the pros and cons you know."
"And how do you do that exactly?"
"Spreadsheets, databases, no seriously gut feel a lot of the time, I'm
quite practised at this you know."
"OK, we'll be back in a few minutes with God, the man with all the
answers, don't go way now."
There was a short shout form the studio floor, "And we're clear." Make
up people swarmed around the host of the show like a group of mechanics
round a racing car.

"Oh something I didn't mention was about my other power."
"What's that then God? You speak to the animals?" A dismembered voice
came from behind the mechanics.
"No I can control time." Said God as he let the storm blow over and the
CNN presenter in seat 142D prepared to land at JFK.