I'm on the radio! I'm in the Guardian!

It’s been a good week all round, which is strange as weeks aren’t normally round (I’ve said this before). Weeks normally have little fish-hooks in your body pulling you closer and closer towards death. Or they are like penguins waddling dangerously towards the cliff, on the other side of which is a penguin-eating shark.

Last Saturday ‘Me and Mickie James’ was reviewed in the Guardian. I’d known for a couple of weeks that I was going to be in it and I was dreading it. Pretty much like a penguin dreads a penguin-eating shark. Have you seen their teeth!

But either this shark wasn’t hungry or penguin-eating sharks are just a figment of my imagination. You see, the review was good. I feel respectable now, I’ve been in the Guardian. Although I don’t feel like a writer. When will that kick in?

(On the tv behind me is the Olympics. I love the Olympics, especially the athletics. I wonder if it’s too late for me to become an Olympic athlete?)

I wonder if I’ll wake up one day and think, ‘I’m a writer’. Writing for me is 5 minutes doing dramatic handstands, walking around the living-room, having a glass of wine, and about one minute sitting at the keyboard. After which I need a sleep.

(I read once this is pretty much how the Coen brothers work. Apart from the handstands. But then I don’t do them either.)

(The Chinese have just beat the Czechs in some rowing event.)

Also this week there is an interview with me over on Chroma. The interview starts, ‘I fell over in the ladies’ loos’ which is always a good place to start an interview. And there’s an article I wrote on Gaydarnation, ‘My Life in Gay Music’. The picture of me accompanying the article was taken at the Marillion convention.

(btw this week I haven’t bought any books but I have bought some music. Cyndi Lauper’s new album, very dancy!, the MGMT album, the Courteeners and Grace Jones Island Life (this after watching Frantic)).

And then yesterday I was on BBC Radio Leicester. The dj was lovely, he had read my book, “bonkers”, and seemed to genuinely like it and like reading. We talked about the Summer Sundae festival, at which I’m at tomorrow on the Phrased and Confused stage. But my favourite bit was when there was a song playing and we were chatting about the Summer Sundae and I asked what the weather was going to be like.

He tapped a few buttons and then gave me a run down of the forecast. I thought, ‘how cool is that, I’ve got my own personal dj’. This is now my own highest aspiration. I want a dj 24 hours a day in a little booth in my room.

Just imagine you could have your own breakfast show, late night love. And when you were feeling down you could have a phone-in.


“Caller on line one, go ahead...”

And there would be traffic news, weather, world news, sport. Just there! In your bedroom!

(Over on the Olympics Iraq have been allowed to take part in the regatta. Phew! ‘There was some controversy.’ I wonder what that might have been...)

Currently reading - Oxford Murders - Guillermo Martinez

Currently listening - as above