Zap.

When the weather changes.
That's when you start to see them.
Mum won't put them out:
She thinks that way
They either starve (from not being able to adapt)
Which makes it cruel,
Or they'll come back, which makes it pointless.
But she's a strict set of rules
Which must be obeyed or

WHHHOOOOTHRULLZAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
Hairy legged clog dancers
Are guilty by nature.

She doesn't mind skinnyrib ballet types though,
So long as they keep moving:
Still and they create a bad impression.
A moving spider is one
Who recognises the likelihood
Of being hoovered up.
They could at least give the appearance
They know there is a threat.

The negative galaxy
Of dingy nebulous bodies
Clinging, some with knitting of babies
Clutched to their chests
In the shadowy white angle
Of the larder ceiling behind the door
Is exempt:
Tactfully out of mind, if accidentally noitced
They have long since spun a plausible story
About their contribions to fly catching.
But my brother said it was a web of lies
And zapped them with the extending nozzle,
Like a baddy in Star Wars.

There's another exeption to Mum's rule:
A spinster
Is allowed to hang out in corner of the bathroom;
(Mum even has a name for her)
But if Cynthia decided
(Llike Sally before her)
To ask round a boyfriend
And then balked at eating the evidence
(Unlikely - "That was great,
What's for supper, Cynthia?"
"It's either you or a towel, I'm afraid,
And veggy food gives me the burps, Sidney" )
Giving rise to the horrid thought
That he's persuaded her to try something
New, ("It may only have two legs, darling,
But the portions are huge!")
Then WHHOOOTHRULLZAPZAP!!!!!!!!!!!!:
Mum'll be too quick for them.

Mum?
......?

"I like this fast food, Sidney.
I hope it's not fattening?"