1. Janet and John Go Shopping

Mummy asks Janet and John to go to the shops.
She wants some bread and some sausages.
John says “Good I like bread”
Janet says “Good I like sausages”
Janet and John like shopping.

Mummy gives John some money to buy the bread and the sausages
Janet thinks Mummy is displaying a surprisingly sexist attitude.
She does not say anything because Mummy has a vicious temper.
John puts the money in his pocket. He does not think about anything.
He never does. He is a boy. Also Mummy hits him when he thinks.

Janet and John put on their hats and coats.
Janet carries the shopping basket.
It is very heavy.
Janet and John walk to the shops.

Janet says “Carry the basket John. It is heavy
The basket is heavy John. Carry the basket.”

John says “Say please”.
John can be very irritating.
Janet breathes in and out. Janet counts to ten.
Janet says “Please carry the basket John. Carry the basket please.”

John looks at her. John looks at Janet
John says “Why should I?” John smans.
John is very pleased with himself.
John can be very very irritating.

“Carry the basket” Janet says “Carry the basket John”
“If you don’t carry the basket” Janet says
“I will tell Mummy what you did with Mary behind the school toilets”
John carries the basket.

John and Janet walk to the shops.
John is quiet. John is not smiling
Janet is quiet. Janet never smiles.

Janet and John go into Mr Green’s shop.
John asks Mr Green for bread.
John asks Mr Green for sausages.
Mr. Green gets the bread. He gets the sausages.

While Mr Green is getting the bread and getting the sausages
Janet gets twenty Benson and Hedges and two bottles of alcopop
Janet puts them in her pockets. Janet has big pockets.
Janet is a big girl. Janet has done this before.
Janet likes shopping.

John pays Mr Green for the bread.
John pays Mr Green for the sausages
“Thank you Mr Green” says John
“Thank you for the bread.
“Thank you for the sausages”

Mr. Green is fat and jolly.
He says “Come back later John.
“Come back later Janet and I will show you my special sausage”

John says “Thank you Mr Green. I would like to see your sausage”
Janet does not say anything.
Janet pulls John from the shop.

Janet and John walk down the street.
Outside Mr. Gupta’s shop they meet Eric.
“Hello Eric” says John
“Hello Eric” says Janet
“Hello John. Hello Janet” says Eric

“We are shopping for our Mummy” says John
“My Mummy is in the Fox and Goose” says Eric
“Bit early isn’t it?” says Janet
“Not for her” says Eric

John does not say anything. He is looking down the street.
“Í can see Mary” says John. “Look Janet. Look Eric” says John
“Mary is coming”
“So what else is new” says Janet
John likes Mary.

Mary says “Hello John, Hello Janet. Hello Eric”
John says “Hello Mary”
Eric says “Hello Mary”
Janet does not say anything.
Janet thinks Mary is a little slapper.

John says “We are shopping for our Mummy
Mary says “My Mummy and Daddy are in the Fox and Goose”
Eric says “I don’t have a Daddy”
John says “You did last week”

Janet says “Don’t worry Eric. She will get you a new Daddy”
Mary says “She’d better keep her hands off my Daddy”
Eric says “He was my Daddy last week”
Janet decides to change the subject.

“Let’s go to the Park” says Janet
“Yes” says John “Let’s go to the Park”
Eric says “The Park is boring”
“Let’s hang about here instead” says Eric

“I have booze and fags” says Janet
“We can have them in the Park” she says
“I like booze and fags” says Eric
“I will come to the Park he says
“I like booze and fags” says Mary
“I will come to the Park” she says

Janet looks at Mary. She looks at her
“Who asked you” she says
“Oh go on Janet” says John
“I like Mary” he says
“I like it when she comes”
“So I’ve noticed” says Janet

Janet and John go to the Park
Eric and Mary go to the Park.
They all go to the Park.