The Worst Song - With Vocals

https://soundcloud.com/hudsonmoon/the-worst-song

This is the worst song

that I ever wrote.

It’s about an old lady

in a liverwurst coat.

 

Her hair it was beehive.

Her shoes leafy green.

Her sauerkraut puss

could melt steel girder beams.

 

One day while walking

her three-legged rats,

a gator crawled by

and ate ‘em like that.

 

Said lady to gator

“You’ve got quite a mouthful.

Do you ever eat husbands?

‘Cause I’ve got me a houseful.

 

“It’s a habit I picked up

in my native Sweden.

Where men sprout from seeds.

Then you bend down and 

weed ‘em.

 

“I hang ‘em on walls 

and some from the ceiling,

but they make my heart ache

when they start all that squealing.

 

“Now they’re starting to smell

like a million dead mouses.

Won’t you come to my house

and go feast on my spouses?”

 

The gator said, ‘no, ma’am,

grown men make me bloat.

I’d rather eat a woman

in a liverwurst coat.

 

So he ate her with mustard

and relished it, too.

Then he burped olive buttons 

and went back to the zoo.

 

And if this ain’t the worst song

that I’ve ever written,

I’ll gladly leave town

like a runaway chicken.

 

Photo courtesy of wiki commons: http://tinyurl.com/y76e5gnw