Lester The Slacker Beetle
By Lou Blodgett
- 137 reads
Who’s that sitting in the corner,
when everything’s disordered.
Doing nothing and, at that, without a care?
In a ‘quake, he finds a crevasse.
Simply hides when there are ninjas.
In a lightning storm it seems he’s unaware?
It’s Lester!
He’s a beetle, that’s the matter.
Yes, Lester!
and, he’s a little slacker.
He’s Lester!
The Slacker Beetle, don’tcha know?
Near murder hornets, you won’t see him.
Despite how much you scree-um.
If there’s an asteroid, he hides within the nap.
He’s ensconced below the deck.
Zombies come, and off he fecks.
‘Cause Lester just can’t handle all that crap.
‘Cause Lester!
Doesn’t have a spine. He can’t.
That Lester!
Conspicuously absent.
That’s Lester!
The beetle everybody knows!
During alien attack,
you’ll find him hiding in a crack.
Claiming that it’s his vacation day.
When sink holes swallow things,
don’t look for help that Lester brings.
Don’t look for anything to come from Lester’s way.
It’s Lester!
Your pleas for help aren’t working.
Yes, Lester!
The one who’s hiding ‘neath the skirting.
It’s Lester!
The Slacker Beetle. Where’d he go?
If the nuclear plant’s unstable,
don’t ask Lester, he’s unable.
You can’t depend on him when all is said and done.
The little guy won’t take a stand.
It’s not a case of won’t, but can’t.
He’s an insect that looks out for ‘number one’.
It’s Lester!
His qualms are all resolved.
It’s Lester!
Studiously uninvolved.
It’s Lester!
-And his Slacker Beetle Show!
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