Debut

He stood on the edge of the rooftop, chest swollen with pride,
scarlet cape fluttering behind him in the chill, Derbyshire breeze. He
placed his hands on his sculpted hips and thrust out his square
jaw.

This was his town. Just let anyone try and commit a crime around
here...

He recalled the past; the burglaries of his beloved corner shop and the
inability of the local police to do anything.

He recalled the lottery win... eight-point-three million pounds... He'd
closed up after that; no need to work fourteen hours a day now...

But he had time on his hands now... and the crimes still
continued...

What to do ? He remembered the comic books he had read as a kid, that
he had sold from the rack in the corner of his shop... telling tales of
bold men who were faster than speeding bullets and who could leap tall
buildings with a single bound.

That was it ! He would become (he imagined the deafening drumroll)... A
SUPERHERO !

But there were so many things to sort out...

Sure, he had the money to finance his operations (he thought of the
Ford Sierra parked at the back of Duckworth Square behind him and
frowned; it was hardly a Batmobile, was it ?) but, beyond that, what
?

There were no radioactive spiders around to bite him, he wasn't an
alien who had been rocketed to Earth as a baby from a dying planet and
he hadn't had parts of his body replaced by steel and bionic
circuitry... Oh well, he'd think of something else...

Over the following years, he trained his body so far beyond the peak of
physical perfection, he had almost achieved escape velocity. His mind
was so sharp, it could slice through steel, and he roamed the world
learning the most dangerous fighting arts, from Tibet to Japan to
Aberdeen...

He was ready, but now what ? Criminals were a superstitious, cowardly
lot... As he sat in his lounge, he pondered on what guise he should
take in order to strike terror into their hearts... Bats and spiders
had been done before... He thought of mice, rats and slugs... Too
limited...

A moth flew in through the open window... He swatted it with a
newspaper and carried on thinking...

Something, then, to reflect his powers (what powers ?), his abilities
(to disarm someone armed with a piece of fresh fruit ?) He shook his
head...

What about a name ? "Captain Mighty" ? "Mister Marvellous" ?
"Ram-Raider" ? He carried on thinking...

As for the costume... eventually, he settled on the standard red and
blue motif, with the trunks over the tights, the swashbuckler-type
boots and the cape flowing in the wind (on his second attempt, he
remembered to put a zipper in the front... His debut was delayed by two
days because he had been caught short)
So, there he was, on the edge of Debenhams roof, staring vigilantly
down at the Saturday afternoon shoppers scuttling along, the hazy
sunlight sparkling on the stylised 'W' emblazoned on his rippling chest
(he had finally settled on the name "WonderMan"... his initial choice,
"The Whippet", was probably not quite as heroic, fast though he
was...)

He heard the scream and squinted at the youth legging it along the
street outside The Pig And Truffle, clutching a handbag that didn't go
with the rest of his clothes.

He whirled majestically on the parapet, the cape swirling around him...
wrapping itself around his legs... and his feet...

He felt his arms pinwheel involuntarily as he toppled backwards,
treading air...

He looked down at four storeys of nothingness and wished that he could
fly, or at the very least, have a rocket pack... He knew he'd forgotten
something...

He hit the pavement hard, and not, being invulnerable, it hurt...

He felt something warm and wet slosh around inside him... He couldn't
breathe properly anymore...

Through clouding eyes, he glanced up at something arcing gracefully
overhead...

Up in the sky... Was it a bird ? Was it a plane ?
Things began to go dark...

*SPLUT !*

Oh... It was a bird...